Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The presented line graph demonstrates the proportion of employments in several sectors like manufacturing,retail,agriculture and healthcare.

Deep analysis of given data reveals that manufacturing and reatiling sector were preferred most in these jobs. While the agriculture and healthcare was quite high

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response identifies the four sectors and attempts to comment on which were most prominent, but it does not adequately summarise the graph. The claim that manufacturing and retail were preferred most is vague and only partly reflects the data: manufacturing led in 1960 and 1980, while retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million jobs by 2020. The statement that agriculture and healthcare were “quite high” is unclear and does not describe their contrasting trends. No meaningful figures or changes over time are reported, and the response is far below the required 150 words. To improve, provide a clear overview and compare the main rises and falls, supporting them with selected figures from the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response into two parts: an opening sentence naming the graph’s subject, followed by a comment on the data. However, the second part does not develop a clear sequence of information, and the contrast introduced by “While” is left incomplete. The ideas are therefore difficult to follow as a summary, with no clear progression from an overview to specific comparisons. Use separate, complete sentences and organise the report around the overall trends, then the key sector-by-sector details. Linking expressions such as “By contrast” or “Meanwhile” can help show how the sectors changed in relation to one another.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some task-relevant vocabulary, including “line graph,” “sectors,” and the names of all four industries, so the topic is recognisable. However, the range is very limited and several choices are inaccurate or awkward: “proportion of employments” does not describe the number of jobs, and “preferred most in these jobs” suggests preference rather than employment levels. “Deep analysis” is also an unsuitable phrase for a brief chart introduction, while “reatiling” contains a spelling error. Aim for precise chart language such as “number of jobs,” “employment,” “rose,” and “declined,” and use these terms to describe actual trends rather than general impressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response shows an attempt to use more than one sentence pattern, including the introductory clause “The presented line graph demonstrates…” and a contrast beginning with “While.” However, the second sentence is incomplete because the “While” clause has no main clause, and the phrase “the agriculture and healthcare was” has faulty agreement and article use. The first sentence also has a punctuation-spacing problem after “manufacturing,” though the main grammatical issue is the limited control of sentence construction. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement when joining two sectors: for example, “Agriculture and healthcare followed different trends.”

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.