Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates job distribution between 4 distinct catagories from the time period of 1960 to 2020.

Overall, healthcare and retail department has increased whereas agriculture and manufacturing had been plummet through 40 year period.\

Looking at the figure, retail and healthcare sector starts from around 6 millions and 2 million jobs which surged drastically through its 40 year time span. By 2020 these end at same level of 16 million of jobs. However, manufacturing peak in first 10 year and change form 15 million to 20 million but it decline in the next 30 years which ends below healthcare and retail department around 13 million. Agriculture department starts with the same numbers as retail but it shows a decrease in its first year period to reduce at 3 million jobs. Furthermore in the next year it remain steady which ends up at 2.5 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad pattern that healthcare and retail rise while agriculture falls, and you include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million and ending at about 13 million. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing does not decline throughout the whole period, since it first rises to a peak in 1980. The claim that agriculture falls in its “first year period” is also unclear; the chart shows a decline from 6 million in 1960 to 3 million in 1980, then a broadly steady level before ending near 2 million. The response is 146 words, below the required 150. Add a clearer overview and describe the main stages and comparisons more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph describing the individual sectors. This gives the reader a basic route through the information, and transitions such as “Overall,” “However,” and “Furthermore” help connect points. The progression within the final paragraph is less controlled, though: several sectors and time periods are packed into one long paragraph, and phrases such as “its first year period” and “the next year” make the timeline difficult to follow. Grouping the rising sectors together and then contrasting them with manufacturing and agriculture would make comparisons clearer. Use more precise time references, such as “between 1960 and 1980,” rather than “the next year.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “job distribution,” “surged,” “decline,” and “steady,” and you attempt to describe changes rather than simply list figures. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “catagories,” “department” for economic sectors, “had been plummet,” and “change form.” These errors sometimes make the intended meaning less clear. “Drastically” is also not the most precise description of the steady rise in retail. Aim for accurate, natural phrases such as “the number of jobs increased,” “the sector peaked,” and “fell gradually.” Check spelling and choose vocabulary that describes the scale and direction of each trend precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast introduced by “However” and a relative clause in “which ends below healthcare and retail.” The main trends are generally understandable, but some errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction remain. For example, “healthcare and retail department has increased” has a plural subject and an awkward verb choice, while “manufacturing peak” needs a past-tense verb. In “starts from around 6 millions and 2 million jobs,” the structure does not clearly match the two sectors. There are also punctuation and spacing problems, including the stray backslash after the overview. Use consistent past-tense reporting and check each sentence for subject–verb agreement and clear comparisons.

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