Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given line graph illustrates the number of job across four distinct economic sectors(manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare) in the United States from 1960 to 2020. The figures are measured in million.

Overall, it is clear that retail and healthcare recorded substantial expansion by becoming the large source of employment, while manufacturing and agriculture declined over the period.Despite an initial rise in manufacturing.

To begin with, retail increased steadily from just 6 million to nearly 16 million in 2020.Similarly, healthcare started with about 2 million employees in 1960, it began to climb sharply after 1980 from 5 million to over 15 million by the final year.

In contrast,manufacturing rose initially and reached 20 million in 1980, however it declined with just 13 million employment. Meanwhile agriculture decreased from the beginning with 6 million fell by halved in 1980 after that it was relatively inactive but it fell slightly by 1 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main overall contrast: retail and healthcare grew, while agriculture declined, and you also note manufacturing’s rise to a peak followed by a fall. The figures you give are broadly consistent with the graph, including manufacturing at 20 million in 1980 and 13 million in 2020. This covers the key trends, but some comparisons are not fully developed: retail and healthcare both finish at about 16 million, a useful endpoint comparison that is not made explicit. The overview’s claim that these sectors became the “large source” of employment is also imprecise, since manufacturing remained the largest sector until 2000. Clarifying the changing rankings and describing agriculture’s relatively stable period from 1980 to 2000 would make the summary more complete and precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, an overview, and separate paragraphs describing growth and decline. Phrases such as “Overall,” “To begin with,” and “In contrast” help signal the organisation, and the reader can follow the broad trends. However, some connections are awkward or unclear. The overview ends with the fragment “Despite an initial rise in manufacturing,” which leaves the relationship unfinished. In the final paragraph, “from the beginning with 6 million fell by halved” makes the sequence difficult to follow, and the contrast between the sectors could be organised more cleanly. Use complete sentences and link each figure directly to its trend; this would make the progression more consistently smooth.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a suitable range of task-related vocabulary, including “recorded substantial expansion,” “climb sharply,” “declined,” and “relatively inactive.” These choices show an attempt to describe trends rather than simply list figures, and the meaning is generally understandable. Some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or imprecise, however: “the large source of employment” is not natural here, and “relatively inactive” does not accurately describe a sector that remained at about three million jobs. “Employment” is also used awkwardly in “13 million employment.” Aim for precise, conventional expressions for chart descriptions, and check that each adjective matches the data. This would improve flexibility and accuracy while retaining the useful range already attempted.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a comparison introduced by “while” and a time clause describing healthcare’s growth. The main trends remain understandable, but some errors in sentence construction and punctuation reduce accuracy. “Despite an initial rise in manufacturing” is an incomplete sentence, while “healthcare started with about 2 million employees in 1960, it began to climb” joins two independent clauses with only a comma. There are also agreement and article issues in “the number of job” and “figures are measured in million,” as well as missing spaces after punctuation. Practise separating complete clauses and checking singular/plural forms and sentence boundaries. More consistent control of these patterns would strengthen the range you are already attempting.

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