Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph shows the number of employment in four different sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the line graph compares four sectors of profession of the economy in the US. It clearly state that manufacturing is most prominent occupation while, healthcare is less prominent in different years.The rate of employment is expand in retail and agriculture whilst the rate is decrease in manufacturing and healthcare.

Firstly, in 1960, 15 million jobs of manufacturing and the number is rose up at 20 million in 1980. Then it fell down at 17 million in 2000 and at 13 million in 2020. Healthcare profession is also decreased from 1960 to 2020.

By contrast, For retails, there are 6 million occupations and the rate is increase at 10 million in 1980, it also enhance at 15 million in 2000 and at last in 2020 it is at 16 million. agriculture is consist as retail.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the chart’s subject and gives some relevant figures, especially the manufacturing sequence of 15, 20, 17 and 13 million and the rise in retail jobs. However, the overview is substantially inaccurate: manufacturing was not consistently the most prominent sector, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020, and healthcare was not the least prominent throughout. The claim that agriculture’s rate expanded is also contrary to the chart; it declined from about 6 million to 2 million. Healthcare’s figures are not reported, and the final statement that agriculture is “consist as retail” does not explain its trend. To improve, give a reliable overview of the contrasting trends and compare the sectors at the start and end of the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: an introduction is followed by an overview and then details, with “Firstly” and “By contrast” signalling a shift between sectors. However, progression is not clear throughout. The overview repeats the introduction and contains conflicting trend claims, while the final sentence about agriculture is too unclear to complete the comparison. The manufacturing and retail details are grouped separately, but healthcare is mentioned only briefly and agriculture is not meaningfully developed. Improve the paragraph structure by grouping rising sectors together and declining sectors together, and use each paragraph to present a clear comparison. Check that linking phrases accurately express the relationship between the information.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses a basic range of topic vocabulary, including “manufacturing,” “healthcare,” “employment” and “million,” so the subject is generally recognisable. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive, which makes some points difficult to understand. For example, “number of employment” and “sectors of profession” are unnatural, while “the rate is expand” and “it also enhance” do not express the trends clearly. “Agriculture is consist as retail” is especially unclear. Use precise chart language such as “the number of jobs,” “rose,” “declined” and “remained stable,” and avoid substituting “occupation” or “profession” for jobs when describing totals.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, and the sequence of manufacturing figures is understandable. However, the range is limited and errors occur frequently, sometimes obscuring meaning. Examples include “It clearly state,” “the number is rose up,” and “the rate is increase,” where subject–verb agreement and verb forms are not controlled. The sentence “Healthcare profession is also decreased” also has an unclear grammatical subject and an incorrect verb pattern. Punctuation and sentence boundaries need attention, particularly the missing space after the full stop in “years.The” and the awkward opening of the final paragraph. Practise forming accurate past-tense trend sentences before adding more complex clauses.

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