Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the given report, the number of jobs increased or decreased in four sectors of the economy in the United States between [redacted phone] period are shown. In the following writings, the information about its main features will be explained and compared where it is relevant. The jobs shown, as per the line chart are Manufacturing, retail, Agriculture and healthcare.

Beginning from the manufacturing, it is stated that there were about 15 million jobs in the year 1960. There was a positive shift in manufacturing due to the year[redacted phone]. But after 1980, the jobs tended to decrease constantly till year 2020. That acted as a negative portion sector of manufacturing.

Secondly, the retail sector is stated. We can see negative start in the retail as only about 7 million jobs are there in this sector in year 1960. But with the course of time till 2020, it continousely rises and proven a positive change and tenhd to more than 15 million.

Thirdly, the agriculture sector is given. It shows a negative shift in the level from [redacted phone]. It was the most undergone sector as compared to rest o the three sectors.

Last but not the least, we have the healthcare sector. This sector has also shown an positive upward sloping graph as per the period [redacted phone].

As compared to alll sectors we get that, the most positively grown sector was healthcare and the most declined sector was agriculture from the period [redacted phone].

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all four sectors and describe the broad directions of change, including manufacturing’s rise and later fall, retail’s growth, and agriculture’s decline. However, the main features are only partly reported: there is no clear overview of the relative rankings or the major crossover, and healthcare’s rise is not supported with figures. Some details are inaccurate or vague: retail starts at about 6 million, not 7 million; manufacturing peaks at 20 million in 1980; and agriculture falls from 6 to 2 million, with a plateau at 3 million between 1980 and 2000. The claim that healthcare was the most positively grown sector is not supported, since retail also rose substantially. Select key figures and compare the sectors directly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: it introduces the chart, discusses each sector in turn, and ends with a comparison. Sequencing phrases such as “Beginning from,” “Secondly,” and “Last but not the least” help readers follow the order, and the sector-by-sector paragraphs provide a workable structure. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some progression. However, the repeated listing pattern feels mechanical, and the final comparison is not well connected to the evidence in the preceding paragraphs. Phrases such as “That acted as a negative portion sector” and “It was the most undergone sector” also make the links between ideas unclear. Grouping related trends and using clearer comparisons would make cohesion more flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sector,” “jobs,” “increased,” “decrease,” and “upward sloping graph,” so the reader can generally understand the subject. There are also attempts to vary expression with phrases such as “positive shift” and “declined sector.” However, the range is limited and several choices are unnatural or imprecise for describing data: “negative start,” “positive portion,” and “most undergone sector” do not clearly express the trends. Spelling errors such as “continousely,” “tenhd,” and “alll” are noticeable, while repeated use of “positive” and “negative” reduces precision. Use standard trend language and accurate verbs to describe rises, falls, peaks, and plateaus.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and the main message is usually understandable. However, control is uneven, particularly in the opening and in sentences that try to combine several ideas. For example, “the number of jobs increased or decreased … are shown” has a subject–verb agreement problem and an awkward passive construction; “between 1960-2020 period” is also not formed correctly. Other examples include “there were … jobs … due to the year1960-1980” and “This sector has also shown an positive upward sloping graph.” Articles, prepositions, and sentence structure need more consistent control. Practise concise comparisons such as “Manufacturing rose from 15 million in 1960 to 20 million in 1980, before falling.”

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