Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph illustrates the different jobs in four diffrent sectors over a period of 60 years from 1960 to 2020 in the US.

Initially in 1960, manufacturing sector tops the graph by providing about 15 million jobs while healthcare was at bottom with 2.5 million jobs. Retail and agriculture, respective provide about 5.1 million jobs.

Till 1980, manufacturing boomed and reached 20 million jobs while agriculture declined and accounts fpr roughly 3 million job opportunities. Retail and healthcare showed growth and reached 10 and 5 millions respectively.

In the year 2000, manufacturing jobs declined and offering about 17 million workplaces while ariculture stayed same. in these two decades, retail and healthcare showd growth and reached 15 million and 11 million respectively.

By reaching year 2020, manufacturing and agriculture declined and contributed approximately13 and 2 million respectively. Manufacturing sector showd stready decline since 1980. Retail showed a little growth to reach about 15.1 million jobs. Healthcare sector showed tremendous growth and touched retail at 15.1 million job slots in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the main movements across the four sectors and include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and agriculture falling to about 2 million by 2020. However, the response lacks a clear overview that summarises the most important overall pattern: manufacturing declined after its peak, while retail and healthcare rose, with healthcare catching retail by the end. Some details are inaccurate or unclear: retail and agriculture were both about 6 million in 1960, not 5.1 million, and the final retail figure was about 16 million rather than 15.1 million. The account is mainly a sequence of year-by-year details, so the key comparisons are not fully developed. A concise overview and more accurate comparisons would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response follows a generally understandable chronological order, moving from 1960 through 1980 and 2000 to 2020. This gives the reader a coherent overall arrangement, and each time period is presented in a separate paragraph. However, the organisation is somewhat mechanical because each paragraph repeats the same year-led pattern, and there is no distinct overview to guide the reader toward the main trends. Some connections are also unclear: “Retail and agriculture, respective provide” does not clearly express the relationship between the two figures, while “In these two decades” is an imprecise reference. Grouping the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together, with clearer linking and referencing, would improve progression and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of task-related vocabulary, including “declined,” “reached,” “boomed,” and “tremendous growth,” so the main trends are usually understandable. However, some choices are imprecise or unnatural for describing employment data. “Different jobs” would be clearer as “employment levels,” and “job slots” or “workplaces” is less suitable than “jobs” or “positions.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “diffrent,” “fpr,” “ariculture,” “showd,” and “stready,” which reduce accuracy. “Touched retail” is an informal and unclear way to describe the two sectors reaching similar levels. Aim for precise, consistent terms and check spelling; this would make the vocabulary more reliable and appropriate to an academic summary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You communicate the sequence of changes using both simple sentences and some longer structures, such as “By reaching year 2020, manufacturing and agriculture declined…” However, grammatical control is uneven, with errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries. For example, “Retail and agriculture, respective provide” has an incorrect adverb form and verb tense, while “agriculture stayed same” needs an article. The sentence beginning “In these two decades” starts with a capital letter after a full stop, but “in” is incorrectly lower-case; elsewhere, “manufacturing jobs declined and offering” combines incompatible verb forms. Some sentences also omit necessary articles or use awkward constructions. Review past-tense consistency and build accurate comparisons with structures such as “whereas” and “while.”

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.