Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph displays trends in about the number of emolyment in four sectors of the economy in thr US namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare. Between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, manufacturing had the highest jobs in 1960 and 1980, but in 2020 healthcare and retail had the highest jobs. Jobs in healthcare and retail went up, while jobs in manufacturing and agriculture went down.

In 1960, about 15 million people worked in manufacturing. This was the biggest number. It went up to 20 million in 1980 and then went down to 13 million in 2020.

Heathcare had only 2 million jobs in 1960. This was the smallest number. But after that it went up very fast and became 16 million in 2020. Retail also went up from 6 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020.

Agriculture was different. It started with 6 million jobs in 1960 and fell to only 2 million in 2020 . This was the lowest number in the end.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You select the main trends and support them with relevant figures: manufacturing rises from 15 million to 20 million before falling to 13 million, while healthcare and retail both reach 16 million by 2020. The overview also identifies the broad contrast between the growing and declining sectors. One detail needs greater precision: manufacturing is not the highest sector in 2020; healthcare and retail are joint highest, which your overview mostly conveys but could state explicitly. You also omit the important intermediate figures for retail and healthcare, so their growth patterns are less fully described than manufacturing’s. Overall, the response addresses the task clearly, with relevant comparisons, though some trends could be developed more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response is organised in a clear sequence: an introduction, an overview, and then paragraphs describing the sector figures. This makes the main information easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Overall,” “But after that,” and “while” help show contrast and change. The grouping of manufacturing separately from healthcare, retail, and agriculture is understandable, although the final three-sector paragraph could compare the rising sectors more directly with agriculture. Some transitions are basic, and the opening sentence is awkwardly split by a full stop before “Between 1960 and 2020.” Smoother connections between the introduction and the time period, and more deliberate comparisons across paragraphs, would make the progression more polished.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic vocabulary to communicate the chart’s main features, including “went up,” “went down,” “fell,” “highest,” and “smallest.” These choices are generally understandable, but the range is limited and several expressions are imprecise or unnatural for an academic summary. For example, “the number of employment” is not a natural collocation, and “had the highest jobs” would be better expressed as having the most jobs or employing the most people. “Went up very fast” is also vague because the chart shows a substantial rise over several decades, not a rate that can be described precisely as fast. Use more varied, accurate trend language and check spelling, including “employment” and “healthcare”.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple sentences and some more developed structures, such as “Jobs in healthcare and retail went up, while jobs in manufacturing and agriculture went down.” Most of the information remains clear, but some grammatical errors and punctuation choices are noticeable. The opening is a sentence fragment: “Between 1960 and 2020” should be joined to the preceding sentence. In “manufacturing had the highest jobs,” the noun phrase is not grammatically well formed; use a construction such as “had the most jobs.” There is also an unnecessary space before the full stop in “2020 .” Aim to connect introductory information in complete sentences and vary sentence structures while maintaining accurate phrasing and punctuation.

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