Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line chart illustrates the proportion about number of jobs in four different sectors namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare of the economy in US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, Retail jobs made up the highest sector in economy followed by healthcare jobs. In addition, we can see noticeable change under Manufacturing and Agriculture sectors.

In 1960, Retailer jobs consistently increased till 1980 from 5 to 10 Million and then after its suddenly rose up upto year 2000 and made 15 Million after 2000 it moving in a straight line upto 2020 and made 16 Million. After retailer jobs, Manufacturing jobs marginally increase from 1960 to 1980 and made 20 Million dollar and itss more than retailer sector and then after year 1980, its suddenly fall downwards from 2000 to 2020.

The most dramatic change we seen under agriculture sector.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the four sectors and include some relevant figures, such as manufacturing rising from 15 to 20 million and retail reaching 15 million in 2000. However, the response only partially summarises the graph: the overview incorrectly says retail was the largest sector overall, although manufacturing led in 1960 and 1980, and healthcare also reached 16 million by 2020. The healthcare trend is not described, while agriculture is mentioned only as having the “most dramatic change,” which is inaccurate because its decline is gradual and comparatively small. The manufacturing decline is also left without figures. The response is 10 words below the required minimum. To improve, give an accurate overview and report the main trends for all four sectors with key comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph with some details. The sequence from retail to manufacturing is understandable, and phrases such as “In addition” and “After” attempt to connect ideas. However, the final paragraph ends abruptly with a single unsupported statement about agriculture, and healthcare is omitted, so the report does not progress through all the main information. Some linking is repetitive or unclear, particularly the long sentence beginning “In 1960, Retailer jobs…” and the sequence “and then after.” Organise the body into clearer comparisons, use one main trend per sentence, and ensure each paragraph develops the overview rather than introducing an isolated claim.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “sectors,” “increased,” “marginally,” and “dramatic change,” and the reader can generally identify which industries you mean. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural: “proportion about number of jobs” does not describe the chart clearly, “Retailer jobs” is not the right term for jobs in the retail sector, and “made 20 Million dollar” confuses a job figure with money. Repeated use of “jobs” and “sector” also makes the report less precise. Aim for accurate collocations such as “the number of jobs,” “employment in retail,” and “reached 20 million,” while varying verbs for rises, falls, and stability.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and use past-tense forms to describe changes, but control is inconsistent. For example, “Retail jobs made up the highest sector” has an unclear grammatical relationship, while “after 2000 it moving in a straight line” is missing a finite verb. In “its suddenly fall downwards,” the verb form does not match the past-time description, and the sentence beginning “In 1960…” contains several clauses joined without clear punctuation. There are also problems with articles and sentence construction in the introduction. Use shorter, complete sentences first, then add controlled comparisons with clauses such as “while” or “whereas.” Check that every sentence has a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

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