Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given graph illustrates the data of millions job in four fectors of the economy in US in the year between 1960 and 2020.

As can be seen from the line graph, it shows the number of job in four different fectors. In the year 1960 the graph of agriculture jobs were at around 7 millions, compare to the 1980, it decline, at approximately 4 millions. Lastly, manufacturing jobs were the maximum at around 20 millions in the year 1980, whereas in the year 2020, it falls down roughly 16 millions.

Nonetheless, healthcare jobs were the manimum in the year 1980 at around 2 millions, however it graw slowly in the year 1980 at around 5 millions. While healthcare jobs increased dramatically, it was around 15.5 millions in the year 2020. a ratail jobs was 6 millions in the year 1960, however it reached to 10 millions in the year 1980. Furthermore, the retail jobs increased significantly in the year 2000, roughly 15.5 millions.

To conclude, retail and healthcare jobs graph were increased drastically, whereas agriculture and manufacturing jobs were decreased significantly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify several relevant trends, including manufacturing’s rise to a peak in 1980 and subsequent decline, and the growth of healthcare and retail. However, coverage is partial and some figures or comparisons are inaccurate: agriculture is about 6 million in 1960 and 3 million in 1980, rather than 7 and 4; manufacturing is about 13 million in 2020, not 16; and healthcare reaches about 16 million by 2020. The overview also says manufacturing decreased overall, although it ends below its peak but remains below its 1960 level only slightly? More importantly, retail and healthcare finish jointly highest, a key comparison that is not clearly stated. Select the main trends accurately and give a concise overview of the final ranking and contrasting sector patterns.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure, moving from an introduction to sector details and then a concluding summary. Some linking words, such as “whereas,” “however,” and “Furthermore,” help signal comparisons. However, progression is difficult to follow because the discussion jumps between sectors and years: healthcare is described as “the manimum” in 1980, then its growth is repeated, while retail’s 2000 figure appears at the end of the same paragraph. Several connectors are also used mechanically or do not clarify the relationship between ideas. Grouping the declining sectors together and the growing sectors together, with each trend described in chronological order, would make the comparisons easier to follow and reduce repetition.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt some task-appropriate vocabulary, including “increased dramatically,” “decline,” and “maximum,” and the reader can generally identify the sectors being discussed. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make parts less clear: “fectors,” “manimum,” “graw,” and “a ratail” are examples. Phrases such as “millions job” and “the graph of agriculture jobs” are also unnatural for describing chart data. Use accurate sector names and standard expressions such as “the number of jobs,” “employment in agriculture,” and “reached a peak.” Checking spelling and choosing precise trend vocabulary would improve clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with contrast clauses, for example, “whereas in the year 2020…” and “While healthcare jobs increased dramatically…”. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and verb forms. Examples include “the graph of agriculture jobs were,” “it decline,” and “it reached to 10 millions”; these patterns make some relationships difficult to interpret. Sentence boundaries and capitalization are also inconsistent, as in the lowercase “a” beginning a sentence after a full stop. Practise forming clear subject–verb patterns and use past-tense verbs consistently when reporting the historical data. Short, accurate comparison sentences would be a useful foundation before adding more complex clauses.

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