Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph below shows the analysis of the number of jobs in four areas of the economy in the US from the year 1960 to 2020. On the X-axis it shows the years from 1960 to 2020 and on the Y-axis it shows the number of jobs in millions for that particular year. These fields are compared in the given chart, Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare.

In the year 1960, the number of jobs in the Retail sector was around 6 million which gradually increased with time and till 2000 it reached upto 15 million and in 2002 it reached to nearly 16 million. For Healthcare sector, the trend is similar to Retail, in 1960 it was approximately at around 2 million jobs and then it increased to 11 million in 2000 and the it sky-rocketed to 16 million in 2020.

In the Manufacturing field, the number if jobs was the highest in 1960 which was 15 million and it increased to 20 million in the next 2 decades, after that the trend for that started declining and it came to around 13 million. The Agriculture field was at 6 million jobs in 1960 and after that it only have declined with the time and it reached to only nearly 2 millions jobs in the year 2020.

To conclude, we can say that the number of jobs was the most in Manufacturing sector during 1960 and that was least in Healthcare around 2 million. The number of jobs declined in Manufacturing sector and reached the sky for Healthcare and Retail sectors

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You cover all four sectors and report several key trends accurately: manufacturing peaks at 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million, while agriculture declines to about 2 million. You also identify the strong growth in retail and healthcare. However, the overview is not sufficiently precise: the conclusion says jobs “reached the sky” in retail and healthcare, without clearly stating that both finish at about 16 million and become the joint highest sectors. There is also a factual slip: retail reaches 16 million in 2020, not 2002. The opening mainly describes the axes rather than summarising the main pattern. A clearer overview and more accurate year references would make the response more complete and better developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, paragraphs describing the sectors, and a concluding statement. Grouping retail with healthcare and then manufacturing with agriculture gives the reader a workable structure, and time markers such as “In the year 1960” and “after that” help show sequence. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The conclusion repeats earlier information rather than drawing together the main comparisons, and “that was least in Healthcare” has an unclear reference. The retail sentence also moves from 2000 to “2002,” disrupting the timeline. Use a concise overview and clearer links between comparisons—for example, contrast the sectors that grew with those that declined—to create smoother progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “Manufacturing,” “Agriculture,” “gradually increased,” “declining,” and “approximately.” These choices make the main trends understandable, and you attempt more expressive language such as “sky-rocketed.” Some wording is imprecise or informal for an academic report: “the analysis of the number of jobs” is awkward, “reached the sky” is not a natural description of a figure, and “fields” is less precise than “sectors.” There are also word-form or spelling slips, including “if jobs” and “upto.” Prefer concise, conventional reporting language such as “the number of jobs,” “rose sharply,” and “fell steadily,” and check compound forms and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and longer sentences with time clauses, as in “the number of jobs … increased to 20 million in the next 2 decades, after that the trend … started declining.” This shows some range, and the overall meaning is generally clear. However, some sentence structures and verb forms are inaccurate. For example, “the trend for that started declining” has an awkward construction, while “the Agriculture field … it only have declined” contains a subject–verb agreement error and an unnecessary repeated subject. “In 2002 it reached” also conflicts with the chart’s final year, 2020. Improve control by using direct clauses such as “Manufacturing employment then declined” and checking agreement, tense consistency, and punctuation when joining clauses.

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