Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

This line graph shows the number of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare sectors in years 1960, 1980, 2000 and 2020.

The highest number of jobs in 1960 was in the manufacturing sector with 15 million jobs and in 1980 it reaches a peak of 20 million and then gradually decreased by 2020, the next highest number of jobs in 1960 was in the retail sector with around 7 million jobs and it had significant increase each year hitting around 16 million jobs in 2020.

Agriculture sector begin at relatively good pace with approximately 7 million jobs but it only suffered a decline from there on and went to the lowest out of all sectors in 2020 with only around 2 to 3 millions jobs. Healthcare sector initially had a minimal number of jobs but it increased steadily through the course of these years reaching to around 16 million jobs in 2020.

Healthcare and retail both began at a comparatively lower rate of jobs but both rose sharply and reached 16 million jobs by 2020. While manufacturing and retail both dropped below their baseline figures.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all four sectors and report several key trends, including manufacturing peaking in 1980 before declining and healthcare rising to about 16 million by 2020. However, the overview is not sufficiently clear or accurate: the final claim that “manufacturing and retail both dropped below their baseline figures” contradicts the graph, since retail rises throughout and manufacturing remains below its 1980 peak but not its 1960 level. Some figures are also imprecise, such as retail and agriculture starting at around 7 million rather than about 6 million. To strengthen the response, give a concise overview of the main contrasts and compare the sectors accurately, especially their rankings by 2020.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response follows a broadly understandable sequence, moving from the opening description to sector trends and then a final comparison. However, the organisation is not fully effective: the second paragraph combines several long trend descriptions, while the final sentence repeats earlier information and introduces a confusing comparison. Linking expressions such as “and then,” “from there on” and “while” help connect ideas, but some relationships are unclear; for example, “both began at a comparatively lower rate” does not clearly distinguish healthcare from retail. Use a separate overview paragraph and group related trends more deliberately, such as declining agriculture and manufacturing versus rising retail and healthcare. This would make progression clearer and reduce repetition.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “peak,” “decline,” “increased steadily” and “rose sharply.” These choices communicate the main movements, and the meaning is generally clear. Some expressions are imprecise or awkward, however: “begin at relatively good pace” does not suit the low starting figure for agriculture, and “reaching to around” is an unnatural collocation. “Baseline figures” is also unclear in the final comparison. Aim for more precise chart language, such as “started at,” “rose to,” and “fell from its peak.” Check plural forms in phrases such as “2 to 3 millions jobs,” where “million” should remain singular after a number.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses linked with “and then,” “but” and “while,” and the overall meaning can usually be followed. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in verb forms and sentence construction. For example, “in 1980 it reaches a peak” shifts into the present tense, while “Agriculture sector begin” lacks both an article and the correct past-tense verb. The long sentence beginning “The highest number…” also joins several complete ideas without clear punctuation, making it difficult to process. Use past tense consistently for the historical data, check subject–verb agreement, and divide long sentences into shorter, controlled comparisons.

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