Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph below illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four seectors of the economy in the country US between year 1960 and 2020. At x-axis number of jobs in millions are given and on y -axis years are given.

In 1960 manufacturing for 15million jobs, which was significantly higher than Retail and Agriculture, both with around 6million jobs and healthcare with only about 20 million while Retail increased to 10 million and Healthcare to 5 million. Actuallly however dropped to 3 million.

From 1980 to 2020 the treand chnaged . Manufacturing jobs fell to about 12 million in 2020. On the other hand Retail and Healthcare continue to grow. By 2020 Retail and healthcare both reached to 15-16 million. Agriculture continue to duminish and reached to about 3 million in 2020.

Overall the number of jobs in manufacturing was highest in1960 and peaked in 1980,it was overtaken by Retail and healthcare by2020. Agriculture jobs saw a steady decline.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main overall pattern: manufacturing peaks in 1980 and then declines, while retail and healthcare rise and agriculture falls. The final comparison that retail and healthcare overtake manufacturing by 2020 is also relevant. However, some details are unclear or inaccurate. In particular, “healthcare with only about 20 million” misreports the 1960 figure, which was about 2 million, and the sentence beginning “while Retail increased…” mixes 1960 and 1980 data without clearly marking the change. Agriculture is described as reaching about 3 million in 2020, whereas it was closer to 2 million. To strengthen the report, present the key stages in chronological order and give accurate, clearly attributed figures for each sector.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an opening, a paragraph on early figures, a paragraph describing later trends, and an overall summary. Time markers such as “In 1960,” “From 1980 to 2020,” and “By 2020” help orient the reader. However, progression is weakened by the second paragraph’s compressed, run-on presentation: “while Retail increased to 10 million and Healthcare to 5 million. Actuallly however dropped to 3 million” leaves the subject of “dropped” unclear. The overview also appears at the end rather than clearly guiding the report. Use one paragraph for the overview and group comparisons consistently, with explicit subjects and transitions between years.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increased,” “fell,” “peaked,” “overtaken,” and “steady decline,” so the reader can understand the broad movements. There is some repetition of “jobs” and “million,” and several spelling errors—“seectors,” “Actuallly,” “treand,” “chnaged,” and “duminish”—make the writing look less controlled. Some phrasing is also imprecise, such as “continue to grow” for a period that includes past data and “reached to” before a figure. Aim for accurate spelling and more varied, conventional chart language, for example “rose to,” “declined to,” and “stood at.” This would make the comparisons more precise and fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more developed sentences, including a comparison with “which was significantly higher than…” and a contrast introduced by “On the other hand.” However, some sentence forms are incomplete or difficult to follow. “In 1960 manufacturing for 15million jobs” needs a finite verb, while “Actuallly however dropped to 3 million” has no clear subject. The opening also reverses the axes: years are on the horizontal axis and jobs on the vertical axis. There are errors in articles, prepositions, and tense, as in “reached to about 15-16 million” and “continue to grow” when describing the period up to 2020. Build complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check tense consistency and punctuation.

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