Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In the given graph ,It shows the hiring of peoples in different brand of US and showing the result from 1960 to 2020.
As in the given graph ,Number of jobs in health care is increasing significally since 1960 while agriculture work is dropping years by years .
healthcare industries starts from zero and in the past years it gains a lot of workers in millions and standing beside is retailers as it also has a lot of work for people .Retail starts from approximately 5 million jobs and now he is also standing with healthcare with a lot of workers .
And the manufacuring industries started well but passsing years the ratio of jobs in this sector drops half of their work and agriculture is way behind from others as it never succeed and not get a little bit of value in since 2020 and
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
You identify several genuine broad trends: healthcare and retail rise, while agriculture declines, and manufacturing falls after an earlier peak. However, the report is only a partial summary and does not give a clear, accurate overview of the main comparisons. For example, healthcare begins at about 2 million jobs, not zero, and manufacturing falls from 20 million in 1980 to 13 million in 2020—not by half. Agriculture remains low, but it does not have “not get a little bit of value”; it ends at about 2 million. The response also stops mid-sentence and is four words below the required minimum. To improve, include a concise overview and support it with accurate start, peak and end figures for the four sectors.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
There is some organisation around the sectors, and basic links such as “while” and “as” help show contrast or addition. However, the response has no clear paragraph structure or overall progression from an overview to selected details. Several ideas are repeated—for instance, healthcare is described as increasing and then again as gaining workers—and references such as “he” and “standing beside” make the relationships between sectors unclear. The final sentence ends with “and,” leaving the report unfinished. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and key comparisons, and connect each figure to a clearly named sector rather than relying on vague references.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “jobs,” “workers,” “agriculture,” “retail” and “manufacturing,” so the general subject is recognisable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or informal for a graph report. “Hiring of peoples” and “different brand” do not describe economic sectors naturally, while “standing with healthcare” and “never succeed” are unclear or evaluative. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “significally” and “manufacuring.” Aim for precise reporting language such as “employment,” “sector,” “rose,” “declined” and “reached,” and check spelling before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response attempts some longer sentences, including a contrast with “while,” but sentence structures are limited and errors occur frequently enough to make parts difficult to follow. The opening has faulty sentence construction (“In the given graph, It shows…”), and subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “healthcare industries starts” and “agriculture is… not get.” Tense and sentence boundaries also need attention: “Retail starts… and now he is” shifts awkwardly, and the final sentence is incomplete. Capitalisation after commas and spacing around punctuation are inconsistent. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use past-tense forms consistently when describing the period shown.
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