Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the information about the jobs in four sectors of the economy in the us from six decades.

Overall, healthcare sector saw the rapid growth between 1960 to 2020 and manufacturing sector saw a minimal graowth in first two decades and then declined in following years.

In the intial years jobs in the healthcare sectors was small and it started growing to 5 million jobs in 1980 until it reaches 16 million jobs in 2020. Where as jobs in agriculture sector saw a downfall, it is started with a 5 million jobs in the year 1960 and dropped to 3 million in 1980 and stayed still till 2000 and again decreased in 2020.

Retail sector rised rapidly till 2000 and then it has a minimal growth to 2020. Jobs manufacturing sector are in it's peak in the first two decades untill it saw it's downfall and it continued till 2020.

In conclusion, jobs in healthcare sector improved over the years and jobs in agriculture sector dropped over the years

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main contrast: healthcare rises strongly, while agriculture declines, and you also describe the broad patterns for manufacturing and retail. The overview is relevant, but it is not fully accurate: manufacturing does not show “minimal growth” in the first two decades; it rises from about 15 million jobs in 1960 to 20 million in 1980. Your account of agriculture is mostly accurate, although it begins at about 6 million rather than 5 million. Retail’s rise to 2000 and slower increase afterwards is noted, but its final level—about 16 million, equal to healthcare—is omitted. To make the key features clearer and more complete, report the main endpoints and comparisons more precisely, especially the sectors’ relative positions by 2020.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement, moving from an introduction to an overview and then to details about the sectors. This makes the main trends easy to follow. However, the final “In conclusion” repeats the overview rather than adding a useful comparison, and some links between ideas are awkward or unclear, as in “Where as jobs in agriculture…” and “it is started with…”. The manufacturing and retail details are also compressed into one paragraph, so the comparisons between them and the other sectors are not developed. Use clearer transitions and organise the body around related trends—for example, rising sectors together and declining sectors together—while avoiding a repeated conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “rapid growth,” “declined,” “dropped,” and “peak,” and the meaning is generally understandable. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for graph description: “minimal growth” understates manufacturing’s rise to 20 million, “rised rapidly” is not the correct form, and “stayed still” is an awkward way to describe a stable figure. Spelling errors such as “graowth” and “intial” also reduce control. Aim for precise, conventional trend language and check spelling and word forms. For example, describe a line as “rose,” “remained stable,” or “reached a peak,” and use “number of jobs” consistently rather than the less natural “jobs … was small.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses linked with “and then” and “until,” and the overall message remains understandable. Some grammatical errors, however, affect accuracy. Examples include “healthcare sectors was” (subject–verb agreement), “between 1960 to 2020” (incorrect preposition pattern), and “it started growing to 5 million … until it reaches 16 million” (inconsistent tense and clause construction). There are also problems with articles and possessives in “jobs manufacturing sector” and “it's peak.” Use past tense consistently for the historical period, check singular/plural agreement, and build comparisons in complete, clearly punctuated sentences. More accurate control of these patterns would strengthen the range you are already attempting.

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