Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the information about employment opportunities in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. These four sectors addressed are Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare.
The Manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs in 1980, while the lowest in 2020 which was 20 million and 13 million respectively. On the other hand, the Agriculture sectors caters with limited number of jobs in 2020 and highest in the year 1960. Such reading is a clear interpretation of the fact that with the evolution of modern technologies, the farmers are also using high machinery for cultivation purposes.
Since 1960, the major change can be seen in the opportunities of job in retail and healthcare sector. The retail sector in year 1960 started with almost 6.5 million which has now increased. In 2020, the last reported number of employment opportunities were 16 million. The individuals are keen towards healthier life style which in results inaugarates multiple fields of health care causing increasing the amount of opportunities.
Overall, there have been fluctuations in every sector of economy, which as a result contributes to the future opportunities in the US.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You identify all four sectors and report several relevant figures, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million in 1980 and its fall to 13 million by 2020, as well as retail’s rise to 16 million. However, the overview is too general: saying that every sector “fluctuated” does not capture the contrasting long-term patterns. Agriculture declined from about 6 million to 2 million, while healthcare rose markedly from 2 million to 16 million; these are central features that should be stated clearly. The claim that manufacturing had its “lowest” level in 2020 is accurate within the period, but the agriculture comparison is expressed unclearly. Explanations about machinery and healthier lifestyles are speculative and not shown by the graph. A more selective overview and accurate comparisons across all four sectors would make the summary more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, paragraphs describing manufacturing and agriculture and then retail and healthcare, followed by a concluding statement. This gives the reader a coherent overall arrangement. Some links, however, are mechanical or unclear. “On the other hand” does not clearly establish the contrast between the two sectors, and “Since 1960” introduces a paragraph whose main focus is retail and healthcare without a clear comparison. The final sentence repeats a broad idea rather than synthesising the trends. Within paragraphs, the discussion sometimes shifts from chart data to unsupported explanations, which weakens progression. Organise the body around the main contrasting trends—declining agriculture, changing manufacturing, and growth in retail and healthcare—and use clearer references to connect the figures.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use relevant topic vocabulary such as “sectors,” “employment opportunities,” and “increased,” and the meaning is generally understandable. There is some variety in how you describe change, but several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, limiting precision. For example, “the Agriculture sectors caters with limited number of jobs” is not a natural way to describe the figures, while “inaugarates multiple fields” is both misspelled and unsuitable in this context. “The individuals are keen towards healthier life style” also sounds speculative and imprecise for an objective graph summary. Prefer direct, conventional reporting language such as “employment in agriculture declined” and “healthcare employment rose.” More accurate collocations and careful spelling would make your descriptions clearer and more appropriate to IELTS Task 1.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast introduced by “while” and a cause-and-effect construction beginning “which as a result.” The main trends can usually be understood, but some grammatical errors reduce clarity. In “while the lowest in 2020,” the clause is incomplete; write, for example, “and reached its lowest level in 2020.” There are also problems with agreement and sentence construction in “the Agriculture sectors caters,” and the phrase “which in results … causing increasing” is not grammatically controlled. Articles and number forms are also inconsistent, as in “the retail sector in year 1960.” Aim for complete clauses and simpler, accurate comparisons before adding complex explanations; this will improve control without sacrificing range.
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