Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph mainly focusing on the representation of four job sectors in united states economy from the period of 1960 to 2020. This provides the characteristics and the nature of growth in four different sectors eventually.

First if we talk about the manufacturing sector it is the highest of holding around 15 million jobs in the yera 1960,and it experiences a maximum in economy within 20 years means upto 1980 after that it gradually faces a downfall till the end also faces highest fall comparativey with other sectors.

And if we talk about the retail and agricultural scetors they both have started at same point,but we can notice that the retail economy has aeen an immensive growth on the other hand the agriculture faces drastical fall.

last but not least healthcare sector has low demand at strating but it shows a gradually increase in demand and growth in economy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and report several broad trends: manufacturing peaks and then declines, retail and healthcare rise, and agriculture falls. These observations are generally grounded in the graph. However, the response only partially fulfils the summary task because it gives very few figures beyond manufacturing’s starting point and does not clearly compare the sectors at the end. For example, retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million jobs in 2020, while agriculture falls to about 2 million; these important comparisons are omitted. The overview is also vague, and claims such as manufacturing having the “highest fall” are not supported with a clear comparison. The response is one word below the required minimum. Include a concise overview and key figures to make the main features clearer.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic sequence, moving from manufacturing to retail and agriculture, then healthcare, and paragraph breaks help separate these points. Linking phrases such as “First,” “on the other hand,” and “last but not least” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, the progression is not fully clear: the opening is general, and the body paragraphs do not establish a strong overview or organise the sectors around their main similarities and contrasts. Repeated openings such as “if we talk about” make the connections feel mechanical, while some sentences run together without clear punctuation. A clearer structure—introduction, overview, then grouped comparisons—would make the information easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “growth,” “downfall,” “increase,” and “fall,” and the reader can generally understand which sectors are being discussed. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning awkward. For instance, “highest of holding” and “maximum in economy” do not naturally describe job numbers, while “drastical fall” and “immensive growth” are incorrect forms. There are also spelling errors such as “yera,” “scetors,” and “strating.” Use precise chart language such as “employment,” “rose,” “declined,” and “reached a peak,” and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to combine ideas in longer sentences, for example by contrasting retail’s rise with agriculture’s decline. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and complex attempts often contain errors that make the writing difficult to read. The opening, “The graph mainly focusing,” lacks a finite verb; “it experiences a maximum … after that it gradually faces” shifts awkwardly between tenses; and “they both have started at same point” has problems with article use and verb form. Several sentences also need clearer punctuation, particularly around clauses joined by “after that” and “on the other hand.” Practise accurate present-tense reporting and build shorter, controlled sentences before combining them.

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