Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This graph show numbers od jobs in four sectors of the economy in tns US. In 1960 the manutacturing sector had 15 millions jobs more than the any sector which show it was the stronger sector in past.Retail and agriculture had 5 millions of jobs in both sectors and healthcare had 2 millions jobs less jobs than other sectors. In 1980 Manufacturing jobs were at its peak and had 20 millions fo jobs in this single sector . Retail market got increased and 5 millions jobs increased from last 20 years. Agriculture sector faced downfall and jobs got lesser to 2 millions and health care incresed from 2 millions jobs to 5 milllions jobs . In 2000 Manufacturing sector got decreased .Retail sector reached to 15 millions jobs.Healthcare increased to 10 millions jobs.Agroculture sector remained same . Then in 2020 Mafucturing sector faced downfall and fell lower than retail jobs .Healthcare sector jumped to 15 millions jobs and Agriculture got decreased. Overall healthcare sector increased thier jobs massively more than any other sector

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980 and then declines, while healthcare rises substantially, and you note that manufacturing is overtaken by retail by 2020. However, several figures are inaccurate: agriculture is about 6 million in 1960, 3 million in both 1980 and 2000, and 2 million in 2020—not 5 million in 1960 or 2 million in 1980. Healthcare reaches about 11 million in 2000 and 16 million in 2020, rather than 10 and 15 million. The overview is also brief and focuses only on healthcare’s growth. To strengthen the report, give a clearer overview comparing the sectors’ overall directions and use accurate key figures to support it.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response follows the years in chronological order, which gives the reader a basic route through the data, and the final sentence attempts to provide an overview. However, the information is presented as one long block, with no clear paragraphing to separate the overview from the details. Transitions such as “In 1980,” “In 2000,” and “Then in 2020” are repetitive, while punctuation around sentence boundaries is often missing, as in “Manufacturing sector got decreased .Retail sector…”. Some comparisons are difficult to follow because several sector details are crowded together. Use a short overview paragraph followed by two organised detail paragraphs, and connect related trends with clearer comparisons.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant terms for describing trends, including “peak,” “increased,” “decreased,” “downfall,” and “jumped,” so the reader can generally understand the intended changes. However, the vocabulary is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “jobs got lesser,” “Retail market got increased,” and “faced downfall.” Spelling errors—including “manutacturing,” “Agroculture,” and “Mafucturing”—also make the report less clear and reduce control of task vocabulary. Aim for precise, consistent phrases such as “the number of jobs rose,” “employment declined,” and “reached a peak.” Check spelling carefully, especially for the sector names used repeatedly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to describe changes across several time points, but sentence structures are mostly simple and errors occur frequently. For example, “This graph show numbers” has subject–verb agreement and article problems, while “Manufacturing jobs were at its peak” has unclear agreement and reference. Plural and quantity forms are also often inaccurate, as in “15 millions jobs” and “2 millions jobs less jobs than other sectors.” Some sentences run together or have faulty punctuation, making relationships between ideas harder to follow. Practise accurate basic patterns first—for example, “The number of jobs in manufacturing was 15 million”—then vary these with controlled comparisons and clauses such as “while” and “whereas.”

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