Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The X-axis of the graph shows the number of jobs in millions, whereas the Y-axis shows the dates.The graph posses different lines which represents each of the four sectors and help the viewer identify the information about the specific sector in the graph.

The jobs in the manufacturing sector were around 15 million in 1960 and saw a 5 million increae in 1980 and then got declined in the coming decades and only around 12.5 million till 2020. The retail sector was around 6 Million in 1960 and saw a really sharp increase till 2000 where the jobs were around 15 million and till 2020 reached nearly 17 million. The agriculture sector shows a decline in all time where the jobs has only decreased to the level that less then half of the jobs were left by 2020. The healthcare sector is one of the sector which had the most growth, in 1960 nearly 2.5 million jobs to nearly 16 million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You report several relevant trends, including manufacturing peaking in 1980 and then declining, retail rising, and healthcare growing strongly. However, the response does not provide a clear overview of the main comparisons across all four sectors, and the agriculture trend is described only generally. Some figures are also inaccurate: manufacturing is about 13 million in 2020, not 12.5; retail is about 16 million, rather than nearly 17; and agriculture falls from 6 to 2 million, so it does not remain above half its initial level. The opening also reverses the axes: years are on the X-axis and jobs are on the Y-axis. Select the key overall patterns and check each figure against the graph to make the summary more complete and accurate.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The information is presented in a generally understandable order, moving through the sectors, and phrases such as “and then” and “where” help connect changes over time. This gives the response a coherent overall arrangement. However, it is presented in only two paragraphs, with the first largely describing the graph’s axes and lines rather than introducing a clear overview. The sector details are then crowded into one paragraph, making comparisons between them less clear. Use a brief introduction, a distinct overview of the main trends, and grouped detail paragraphs—for example, rising sectors together and declining sectors together. This would strengthen progression and make the relationships between the data easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increase,” “declined,” and “growth,” and the meaning is generally clear. However, some choices are imprecise or repetitive: “really sharp increase” is informal, while “got declined” is not a natural collocation. “The jobs has only decreased to the level” is also an awkward way to describe the agriculture figures. There are spelling errors in “posses” and “increae,” and capitalisation is inconsistent in “6 Million.” Choose precise, standard chart language and vary it where appropriate, such as “rose steadily,” “fell,” and “reached.” More accurate collocations and careful proofreading would make the description clearer and more suitable for an academic report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of sentence forms, including clauses linked with “where” and “and then,” and most of the intended meaning can be understood. However, some grammatical errors remain. In “The graph posses different lines which represents,” the verb does not agree with its subject; “lines” requires “represent.” The phrase “the jobs has only decreased” also has subject–verb disagreement, and “one of the sector” needs a plural noun. The opening sentence has a missing space after the full stop, and the long sector descriptions would benefit from clearer sentence boundaries. Practise checking agreement, articles and plurals, and use a range of shorter, accurately controlled sentences alongside complex ones.

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