Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The rapid increment in population is going so far thus creates accomadations problem to commoners. However, there are some suggestions given by public is that construction of long building would mitigate severe issue. I firmly believe this would be a relevant approach but should me combine with other measures for better outcomes.

The growing number of migration all around the world where people from rural areas relocating to urban areas for seeking job opportunities and better resources. Moreover, this process is very natural but creates numerous problems such as shortage of houses and rental appartment, rising of prices makes it hard to find a shelter for living. Furtermore, this contributes to plenty of social issue like out of shortage many individual are forces to live on streets and contributes to criminal activities like robberies, kidnapping and so on. Construction of tall building would alleviate the issue.

Long building such as which contain many block and a durable material would hold hunders of people without requiring extra land. Additionally, there are many empty ghost towns where hunders of monuments not longer in use, the government should investing on renovation to make it accessible for local use and solve the ongoing issue. Nevertheless, enforcement of strict laws on property owners where they should charge relevant prices on tenats because this would reduce a huge burden as majority of people are students and couln't manage all the expenses.

In conclusion, Long building would truly help the society but it alone couln't solve the huge demand of accomadition, a balance approach would be more helpful for holistic outcomes.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the construction of tall apartment blocks. You clearly state your position in the introduction, arguing for a balanced approach. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you mention the benefits of tall buildings, the second body paragraph shifts focus to renovating ghost towns and rent control, which are distinct from the prompt's focus on tall buildings. To achieve a higher band, ensure that every paragraph directly supports your central argument regarding the efficacy of high-rise construction. The ideas are relevant but could be more thoroughly extended with specific examples or deeper analysis of the urban planning implications.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'Nevertheless' to link ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as the transition 'Long building such as which contain...'. Additionally, some sentences lack smooth flow, making the progression of ideas feel a bit disjointed at times. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that referencing (e.g., 'this process', 'the issue') is always clear will help improve the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning. You use some topic-specific terms like 'urban areas', 'rental apartment', and 'social issue'. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'rapid increment in population' (should be 'increase'), 'accomadations problem' (spelling and collocation), and 'long building' (should be 'high-rise' or 'tall buildings'). These errors are noticeable and occasionally distract the reader. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and refining your spelling of academic vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, they often contain grammatical errors, such as 'The growing number of migration... where people... are relocating' (fragmented structure) and 'government should investing' (incorrect verb form). There are also frequent issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'construction of long building' instead of 'the construction of tall buildings'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for verb tenses and pluralization.

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