Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some people believe that parents should taught their offsprings how to becoem a better person in the society, while other believe that educational institutions are the best place for them. Although, many people think that schools should focus on the well being of children but I believe that it is the responsibility of parents to teach their children life lessons.

Educational institutions play a vital role in the upbringing of a child. Children learn many practical life lessons in their schools and as they become familiar with them, they tend to apply them in their daily life. In addition to this, they also listen and practice moral values and ethicsnfrom their teachers. For example, in many countries around the world children aged three to five usually attend the school in order to practice learning how to sit properly and behave in a good manner which really help them in practicing discipline. Although these lessaons are taught from the very early age but still children need there parents survillence.

Children usually spend most of their time with their parents. Parents who act properly around their offsprings usually tend to have good manners because children are reflection of their parents, therefore, they should focus on their nurturing. For instance, one of the greatest poet of 20th century, Allama Iqbal started his early education in his home, his father was one of the driving force behind him to prove himself beneficial for the society. So, parents should work on their children and spend time with them in order to make them learn the true values of life.

Educational institutions should work on the children by teaching them the core values, however, parents play a key role in this process and their small acts can help children become a good member of the society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 3.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the roles of parents versus educational institutions in shaping children, though it curiously debates a completely different topic than the actual question provided in the prompt, which asks about tall apartment blocks versus providing homes in large cities. Because the student answered a standard essay prompt about parenting and education instead of the housing prompt given in the instructions, the task achievement is severely compromised. The student attempts to take a position, stating that parents carry the primary responsibility, but the complete disconnect from the stimulus text prevents higher band scoring. Ideas are introduced and supported with some general arguments and an example of Allama Iqbal, but the failure to address the core topic of urban housing results in a low band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays basic structural organisation, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a concluding remark, reflecting an attempt at logical progression. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. The student uses standard transitional phrases like 'In addition to this' and 'For example', but referencing is sometimes unclear, such as ambiguous pronoun use ('them', 'they') that confuses the reader. Paragraphing is present and generally marks shifts in topic from schools to parents, but the overall logical flow is disrupted by repetitive phrasing and awkward transitions. Cohesive devices are occasionally inadequate or awkwardly applied, resulting in a score that reflects basic organisational attempts with noticeable flaws.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The student demonstrates a limited but minimally adequate vocabulary range suitable for discussing basic social concepts. Words related to education and upbringing appear, such as 'educational institutions', 'upbringing', and 'moral values'. However, the text contains numerous spelling, word-choice, and morphological errors that impede communication at times. Examples include 'becoem' instead of 'become', 'offsprings' instead of 'offspring', 'ethicsnfrom' instead of 'ethics from', 'lessaons' instead of 'lessons', 'there' instead of 'their', and 'survillence' instead of 'surveillance'. These errors highlight a lack of precision and control over less common lexical items, keeping the vocabulary score within the lower-middle range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response exhibits a mixed range of simple and complex sentence forms, but attempts at complex structures are frequently marred by grammatical inaccuracies. Notable errors include subject-verb agreement and tense issues, such as 'Some people believe that parents should taught' instead of 'should teach', and 'other believe' instead of 'others believe'. Punctuation and word-form errors are recurrent throughout the text. While the basic meaning can often be discerned, frequent errors in grammar and mechanics cause noticeable difficulty for the reader and prevent the text from achieving a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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