Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

As the current era is conncted with advancements and novelities in life styles. The enhancement of population in cities resulted in the need for more habitats.The appropriate ways to accomodate people in this regards is to build homes in tall apartments blocks. I partialy disagree with this stance as I can support my viewpoint with the relevent examples.

Although, the large cities have the facilities for a standard living, but it would not be cempetible for people, because of concerns for deforestration. As the people move towards these cities this shift widen the complexity and also give birth to multiple challanges regarding accomodation.For instance, a survey in 2020, narrated that the trees are cutting down to accomodate with problems of habitat. Another, concern is that the building of skyscrapper appartments defuses the pollutants which get mixed with the air and cause the more threats to our environment. The research held in USA, demonstared that the people from rushy areas were seen in more hearing problrms and skin diseases as compare to the other people who live in a peaceful surroundings.

However, It also has the advantages that it building block appartments can provide habitat to a big amount of people. This shift also unfolds variety of opportunities in educational settings. Multiple students get interacted and equip themselves with adequate skills' knowledge. The census perfomed in Canada in 2023 provide insights and thought provoking results regarding the employbility of students who graduated from the big cities.

Conclusively, the building of block appartments at its first impression divert attention towards the alarming situation of pollution and deforestration. Beyond this, it also avail the people to live and experince the life in big cities which enable them towards their fulfilment of their goals.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt regarding tall apartment blocks, but the treatment of the task remains limited and under-developed. Although you state a partial disagreement, your position is not always clearly sustained throughout the essay, as your arguments fluctuate between environmental drawbacks and educational benefits without strong overall synthesis. The ideas presented, such as deforestation and student employability, lack sufficient extension and support, relying on vague generalisations like 'a survey in 2020' or 'the research held in USA'. To move to a higher level, you need to fully develop your position with well-reasoned explanations and concrete, specific examples rather than brief, unsupported assertions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is some organisation in your essay, with clear paragraph breaks separating your introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, but there is no clear overall progression throughout the text. Cohesive devices are sometimes inaccurate or over-used, such as the abrupt transitions using 'Although' and 'However,' which disrupt the logical flow between sentences. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, as seen with phrases like 'This shift,' which do not always point back securely to a well-defined antecedent. To improve cohesion, you should ensure that your ideas are linked smoothly with accurate and varied cohesive markers, and that each paragraph builds logically upon the previous one to guide the reader clearly through your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary range is limited, containing noticeable errors that occasionally cause some difficulty for the reader. There are several spelling and word-form errors throughout the text, such as 'conncted,' 'novelities,' 'habitats,' 'accomodate,' 'cempetible,' 'deforestration,' 'skyscrapper,' 'appartments,' 'demonstared,' 'rushy,' 'employbility,' and 'experince.' Additionally, word choices and collocations are frequently unnatural, such as using 'rushy areas' instead of crowded areas or 'big amount of people' instead of a large number of people. To achieve a higher band, you must expand your vocabulary range, use less common lexical items accurately, and carefully check your spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a very limited range of sentence structures, and your attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. There are frequent grammatical errors in verb forms, tenses, agreements, and articles that can cause difficulty for the reader. Examples include 'The enhancement of population in cities resulted,' where the tense is misused for a general truth, 'the trees are cutting down' featuring a faulty passive voice, and 'cause the more threats to our environment' with an incorrect article. Furthermore, punctuation errors and awkward prepositions persist throughout the writing. To progress, you need to practise constructing error-free complex sentences and maintain strict control over basic grammar rules like subject-verb agreement and active/passive voice.

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