Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In recent years tall apartment blocks has become a widely discussed issue in the whole world. This essay will discuss views about construction of tall apartment and i will argue that opinion.

In the whole world population is increased. Due to over population peoples need home and better facilities. But in the country side areas these facilities could not provided in the best way. So, people can decide to move cities. In large cities, the proper place of living colonies are not maintained. Due to this situation, the builder makes a tall apartment to provide better facilites to people who moved to cities. The tall apartment building has all amenities of living. They provides best gym, hospital, parking. international brands and shopping malls. That is the reason i recommend tall apartment. They facilitate you in the best manner.

Countries economy has been increased since 2020. After that, people was grow up. And took a decision of better living. Furthermore, the living qualites of thinking is change also. Now, the people are wealthy. They do not prefer old type of building. In the tall building apartment people can live like a family. They are protect one another. They are living in a good manner. Moreover, they do not like joined family system like a relatives. However, people can prefer large cities and also tall apartment.

I prefer tall apartment because it provides better facilites to people and consume small places. They also modernized your fulture and guide you how to live.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the prompt only partially. While the writer attempts to present an opinion regarding tall apartment blocks, the position is not always clear throughout the essay. The ideas presented are limited and under-developed. For instance, the writer mentions that tall buildings provide amenities like a gym, hospital, parking, and shopping malls, but fails to extend or support these points with relevant explanations or concrete examples. Furthermore, irrelevant personal commentary and unsupported generalizations about population growth and societal changes hinder the development of a well-supported academic argument. To reach the next level, the writer needs to present a fully developed position with well-supported ideas and clear explanations for every main point raised.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is some basic organization evident in the division of paragraphs, but the response lacks a clear overall progression. While paragraph breaks are attempted, the internal logic within paragraphs is frequently disrupted by abrupt shifts in topic, such as jumping from urban facilities directly to economic changes and family structures. Cohesive devices are used in a mechanical or repetitive manner, such as the frequent repetition of 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', and 'However', and referencing is sometimes unclear, as seen with pronouns like 'They' referring vaguely to multiple preceding nouns. To improve, the writer must ensure a logical sequence of ideas from sentence to sentence and employ a wider range of cohesive devices naturally without over-reliance on basic transition words.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'amenities', 'global population', and 'facilities', but these attempts are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and word form, such as 'place of living colonies', 'fulture', and 'living qualites of thinking'. There are also frequent issues with basic word forms and spelling that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader in grasping the intended meaning. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to expand their lexical range and demonstrate greater precision in word choice and collocation, ensuring that less common lexical items are used accurately and appropriately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying primarily on simple sentences with frequent attempts at complex sentences that are heavily flawed. There are frequent errors in grammar, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'tall apartment blocks has' and 'peoples need', incorrect verb tenses such as 'population is increased' and 'people was grow up', missing articles, and awkward prepositional phrases. These frequent errors cause noticeable difficulty for the reader. To progress to a higher band, the writer must improve control over basic grammatical structures, master subject-verb agreement, and increase accuracy when attempting complex sentence forms.

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