Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Large cities have space problem so indivduals prafer to build or rented the tall apartment blocks .I am disagree with the statement that large apartment are good for living.

To commence with, In large cities individuals and builders mainly prefer to build the large apartment and consist of 5 to10 floors . To explain it , Builders or the rich

merchants trader their main motive is to earn profit by spending lss on buying the lands and don't think about the safety and use low quality material in it that cause so much risk to building destruction in any disaster. For instance, in himachal building was destroyed by water due to the low quality of material is used.Hence, the building have parking problems too.

Furthermore, Tall building also gives us the view of all the area while the apartment is on top floor and the rent of top floor apartment is also less as compared to the ground floor. For instance, The burj khalifa is the tallest building in the world but not having the proper dreainage system facility in it. Thus tall building ave us money rather than just buying the land and construct the home.

To incapsulate, buildermain motive is to earn profit from the apartment he or she build rather than just providing any kind of safety while tall buildng have the best and beautiful view

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

Your position is stated at the start (“I am disagree”) and repeated in the conclusion, and you give relevant concerns about safety and parking. However, the response only partially addresses whether tall apartment blocks are the best way to provide enough homes: it does not compare this approach with alternatives or explain clearly how the examples support your position. The paragraph about the view from upper floors and lower rent is also confusing and seems to support tall buildings, which conflicts with your stated disagreement. The examples about Himachal and the Burj Khalifa are not sufficiently explained. The response is 21 words below the required minimum, which also limits the development of your ideas. Develop a consistent position and support it with clearer, relevant reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic essay structure, with an opening, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposts such as “To commence with,” “Furthermore” and “To incapsulate” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, progression is difficult to follow because ideas within paragraphs are not consistently connected. For example, the second body paragraph moves from the view and rent of upper-floor apartments to the Burj Khalifa’s drainage, then concludes that tall buildings save money. The relationship between these points is unclear. Some references, such as “it” and “that,” do not make their meaning precise, and the conclusion repeats the safety concern without resolving the mixed position. Organise each paragraph around one clear reason and explain how each example supports it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “apartment blocks,” “safety,” “low quality material,” “parking problems” and “profit,” so the reader can identify the general subject. There are also attempts at less common wording, such as “disaster” and “drainage system.” However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand, including “indivduals prafer,” “lss,” “dreainage” and “incapsulate.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “trader their main motive” and “gives us the view of all the area.” Choose accurate collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise language for housing supply, construction standards and urban planning would help express your argument clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including a reason-and-result structure in “Builders … don’t think about the safety … that cause so much risk.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors frequently affect clarity. Examples include “I am disagree” instead of a correctly formed verb phrase, “the building have” instead of subject–verb agreement, and “the rent … is also less” within a sentence whose relationships are unclear. Articles, plurals and sentence boundaries also need attention; for example, “Tall building also gives us” does not agree in number, and several sentences join multiple ideas without clear punctuation. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then build longer sentences with clear subjects, verbs and links between clauses.

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