Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

For enough space in big cities there shuold bulid tallest apartments. comparison with the city life and village life every one wants to live in a big cities because large cities have many oprtunities for workers. IN this essay we will discuss about city life and its benfits and on the other hand the main steps to provide space to live in cities. Now a days ,everyone suffring with the finaciall problems .There may be one of most problem is less oprtunities''.Money can not buy everything but financial staybilities is nessasry for living; Infact city life is more benificial for thoes who are a bread winner of thier houses .They have to work extremy hard to achive thier goals.They want to move in cities but thier are not much space for them to live in they feel mix of disopiontment and confusion . On the other hand cities are crowded by migrated people.The new comer has to face various obstcles for accomodation .They decids to go back thier home town . if they buldings are huge and tall they can live in cities and mange their hardles. In my opnion there should be a tallest bulldings in citis for people whome they want to live in cities.The houses structures are well manegeable and fully faclitated for indaviguls.the best option for thoes who surving for jobs and other problems of acmodation.in this way citizen get some chance for beeter life. And these kind of efforts make them relislient and determined .if every on is happy around us there are less chance of crime also.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You take a position in favour of tall apartment buildings, especially in the final paragraph, and connect the issue to housing pressure in cities. The discussion of people moving for work and struggling to find accommodation is relevant. However, the response only minimally addresses the central question of whether tall blocks are the best way to provide enough homes. It does not compare this approach with alternatives or explain its practical benefits in detail; claims such as “fully faclitated” housing and reduced crime are asserted rather than supported. The opening also promises a discussion of city and village life, which is not developed. To strengthen the response, state your degree of agreement clearly at the outset and support two or three focused reasons with specific examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening, discussion of employment and housing pressures, a contrasting paragraph about migration, and a concluding opinion. Connectors such as “On the other hand” and “In my opinion” signal shifts in direction. However, the progression is difficult to follow because ideas are crowded together, links between claims are often unclear, and the conclusion introduces points about crime and resilience without developing them earlier. The opening’s promise to compare city and village life also does not guide the essay that follows. Use clear, separate paragraphs for your position, each main reason, and the conclusion. Within each paragraph, explain how one idea leads to the next rather than relying mainly on transition phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “accommodation,” “financial stability,” “bread winner,” and “resilient.” These choices show an effort to discuss employment, migration, and housing rather than relying entirely on very basic terms. However, the range is limited and many spelling and word-choice errors make the message difficult to read, for example “oprtunities,” “obstcles,” and “acmodation.” Some phrases are also unnatural or unclear, such as “houses structures are well manegeable” and “surving for jobs.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “housing shortage,” “high-rise apartments,” and “affordable accommodation” would help you explain the issue clearly and avoid repeating general references to people and cities.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including “They want to move in cities but thier are not much space for them to live in,” so there is some effort to connect clauses. However, sentence structures are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries frequently make meaning hard to follow. For example, “there shuold bulid tallest apartments” lacks a clear subject and has an incorrect verb pattern, while “there are less chance of crime” has agreement problems. Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, with several ideas joined into long, difficult-to-read sentences. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them using controlled clauses. Check that each sentence has a clear subject and verb, and review articles, plurals, and punctuation.

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