Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-24
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The plans below show a college cafe before it was redesigned and how it looks now.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The plans below show a college cafe before it was redesigned and how it looks now.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The illustration below shows a college cafe before and now. There is a few new features, which giving the cafe beautiful design.
Overall, cafe looks different then and present design, a new areas, more places and new devises. For example, then pattern look like fewer spots and еhere's nothing to do there, this may be caused by only two staff dining room bin, restroom, serving place, kitchen and all the hostel filed in tables and chairs. Moreover, previously cafe wasn't layout so good.
However, today cafe changed not by places, but new areas. Instead of serving area new hot meals, two staff dining room placed by take away food and coffee bad, at the hostel setting up salad bar, recycling bins. Even outside new updating: outdoor seating and barbecue.
Consequently, now cafe fashioned at good side
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you attempt to describe the changes, the information is presented in a fragmented and often confusing manner. You identify some key features, such as the salad bar and outdoor seating, but the description lacks the necessary clarity and analytical depth required for an Academic Task 1 report. The comparison between the 'before' and 'now' states is hindered by unclear phrasing and a lack of structured reporting. To improve, ensure you provide a clear overview and group related features logically to help the reader understand the transformation of the cafe layout.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5
The essay lacks a clear logical progression. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the internal structure of the paragraphs is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often inappropriate or mechanical, such as the misuse of 'Consequently' and 'Moreover'. Referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between the two plans. The sentences do not flow well, and the lack of clear transitions between the 'before' and 'after' states makes the overall arrangement disjointed. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear focus would greatly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary range is quite limited and often inaccurate. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'new devises' (likely meaning 'facilities' or 'features'), 'hostel filed in tables', and 'cafe fashioned at good side'. These errors occasionally impede communication, as the intended meaning is not always clear. You rely on basic vocabulary and struggle to use precise terms to describe the layout or the specific additions to the cafe. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to describing maps and plans, such as 'relocated', 'extended', 'installed', or 'converted'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that often distort the meaning. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'There is a few new features'), incorrect verb tenses, and awkward sentence structures (e.g., 'previously cafe wasn't layout so good'). The range of structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with errors. Punctuation is also inconsistent, which further affects the clarity of your writing. To improve, you need to focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that your subjects and verbs agree and that you are using the correct tense when describing past and present states.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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