Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The plans below show a college cafe before it was redesigned and how it looks now.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The plans below show a college cafe before it was redesigned and how it looks now.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

According to my analysis the fist map of cafeteria is ok. the area of this surrounding isnot properly use.

But i see a second design of the cafe it is much better than the first one. they use properly area for design the food service corner and also they use the outdoor sitting arrangements this is the best part of second one design. i love it outside sitting arrangements.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response recognises that the second design makes better use of the space and identifies outdoor seating as a notable addition, so it shows a basic understanding of the comparison. However, it does not provide a clear overview of the main changes or describe specific features accurately: for example, it does not mention the new hot-meals counter, takeaway and coffee areas, salad bar, or recycling bins. The comments that the first café is “ok” and the new design is “much better” are personal opinions rather than a factual summary of the plans. The response is also 81 words below the required minimum, leaving the task only minimally addressed. To improve, give an objective overview and compare several key changes in location and function.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a simple progression from the first plan to the second: you begin with “the fist map” and then introduce “a second design,” before highlighting the outdoor seating. This gives the reader a basic sense of comparison. However, the response is presented as one short block, and the ideas are not developed into a clear sequence of overview and supporting details. The link “But” does not establish a precise contrast, while “also” joins points without explaining how the new facilities relate to the original layout. Organise the response into an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph describing the main changes. Use clear references such as “the former staff dining rooms” and “the new outdoor area” to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use a few relevant terms, including “cafeteria,” “food service,” and “outdoor sitting arrangements,” which show an attempt to describe the plans. However, the vocabulary is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “the area of this surrounding,” “use properly area,” and “second one design.” “I love” is also too personal for an academic report. These choices make some points less clear and reduce the precision needed to describe changes in a floor plan. Build a set of accurate terms for facilities and locations, such as “counter,” “seating area,” “along the western wall,” and “replaced by.” Prefer neutral reporting language, for example, “The redesign adds…” rather than giving a personal preference.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts connected sentences, including “they use properly area for design the food service corner,” but control of sentence structure is limited. Errors in articles, word order, and sentence boundaries appear in phrases such as “the fist map of cafeteria,” “the area of this surrounding isnot properly use,” and “it is much better than the first one.” The final sentence, “i love it outside sitting arrangements,” also lacks a clear grammatical relationship between its parts. Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including the lowercase “i” and the missing space in “isnot.” Use straightforward, complete sentences with a consistent present tense to describe the plans, and check articles and word order—for example, “The café has an outdoor seating area.”

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