Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATES THE HOW RAIN SHADOW DESERT FORMED

AFTER ANALYZING THE DIAGARM , FIRSTLY WE SEE WIND IS APPROACH TO COAST AFTER THIS WIND IS GONE UPWARDS MOST OF AIR INCREASE AND BECOMING COOL THEN APART FROM THESE THE CLOUDS ARE FORMED

IN THIS WAY THE PROCESS GONE AND DRY AIR GOING OVER THE HILLY MOUNTAINS AFTER THE PROCESS GOING AT FINAL INITIAL STAGE THEN THEN WE GOT DRY WIND REACHES THE INLAND AREAS THEN IN LAND THERE IS RAIN SHADOW FORMED

OVERALL THERE ARE TOTAL SEVEN STEPS OF RAIN SHADOW FORMED

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. Because the response is only 93 words, the information is presented in a very fragmented and underdeveloped manner. While you have attempted to describe the process, the lack of detail and the failure to reach the required length mean that the task is only partially addressed. To improve, you must expand on the description of each stage of the process, providing more detail about the meteorological conditions and the geographical features involved in the formation of a rain-shadow desert.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The response lacks clear paragraphing and logical progression. While you use some basic transition words like 'firstly' and 'overall', the flow of ideas is disjointed. The sentences are often repetitive and lack the necessary cohesive devices to link the stages of the process smoothly. The structure is more of a list of observations rather than a cohesive summary of a scientific process. To improve, focus on grouping related information into distinct paragraphs and using a wider variety of linking words to show the relationship between the different stages of the rain-shadow effect.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very limited and repetitive. You rely on basic verbs like 'gone', 'going', and 'got', which are not appropriate for an academic report. There are also issues with word choice, such as 'wind is approach to coast' instead of 'wind approaches the coast'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to describe a technical process accurately. To improve, you should learn and use more precise terminology related to geography and meteorology, such as 'moisture-laden', 'precipitation', 'elevation', and 'arid'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that impede clarity. Examples include 'THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATES THE HOW RAIN SHADOW DESERT FORMED' (missing 'is' and 'a'), 'WIND IS APPROACH TO COAST' (incorrect verb form), and 'MOST OF AIR INCREASE AND BECOMING COOL' (incorrect tense and article usage). The sentence structures are simple and often contain errors in subject-verb agreement and word order. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically the use of articles, verb tenses, and prepositions in an academic context.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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