Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This pictorial diagram illustrates the formation of rain- shadow desserts that process covering the distance in about thousands of kilometers. Downward area of sea moving upward to mountain for rain that range constatly taking down air to the desert.

Overall, the winds that statrs from the seaside it found coast that pushing the wind upwards along windward side where this air and hot steam that coming up from  water create humadity in weather. The formation of rain-shadow desert has completed in seven stages.

Inatially, we can see winds that comes from other side and find force to stay from mountain to push it up with the withdraw side that become the cause of clouds and rain top of the mountain.

Afterwards, dry air that moving down to the Inland it expanding in the dessert where dry wheather getting around from the leeward side.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While the student attempts to describe the process, the explanation is fragmented and lacks a clear, logical summary of the stages shown in the diagram. Key features, such as the specific transition from the windward to the leeward side, are described in a confusing manner, making it difficult for the reader to follow the scientific process. The response lacks a clear overview of the main trends or stages, and the under-length nature of the text prevents a fully developed response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical flow between them is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as 'Inatially' and 'Afterwards', which do not effectively connect the complex stages of the process. The referencing is frequently unclear; for example, the phrase 'find force to stay from mountain' is confusing and disrupts the progression of ideas. The overall structure lacks the necessary cohesion to guide the reader through the scientific explanation, leading to a disjointed reading experience.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate, which impedes communication. There are several spelling errors, such as 'desserts' instead of 'deserts', 'humadity' instead of 'humidity', and 'statrs' instead of 'starts'. The word choices are frequently inappropriate for an academic report, such as 'hot steam' to describe moisture and 'withdraw side' instead of 'leeward side'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to describe the technical process accurately, and the persistent errors in spelling and word choice make the text difficult to interpret.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The grammatical control is weak, with frequent errors that often distort the intended meaning. Many sentences are grammatically incomplete or poorly constructed, such as 'Downward area of sea moving upward to mountain for rain that range constatly taking down air'. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the simple sentences used are often riddled with errors in subject-verb agreement and preposition usage. Punctuation is also inconsistent, further complicating the readability of the text. The high frequency of errors significantly impacts the clarity of the report.

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