Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The beginning in the process of formation - rain shadow deserts , at first the winds approach coast over the sea then the winds pushed up today's the top of the mountain while going towards the top moist air rises and becomes cool and that eventually form clouds which resulte as rain fall then the dry air continues to flow over the mountain in the leeward side and then the dry wind continues to go down and down from the top to the bottom of the leeward side of the mountain which is the opposite side of the mountain which is known as windward side where the wind started going up in the top so then in the final process the wind reaches in land area where it's finally results in the formation of rain shadow deserts and here the total process of the rain shadow deserts formation gets end

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main stages of the process, from the initial moisture-laden winds to the final formation of the desert. However, the report lacks a clear overview or summary of the process, which is essential for Task 1. The description is somewhat repetitive, particularly in the explanation of the mountain sides, and it lacks a formal, objective tone. While the key features are identified, the lack of paragraphing and the informal, run-on sentence structure make it difficult to distinguish between the distinct stages of the process effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response is written as a single, long, run-on sentence, which severely impacts coherence. There is a lack of paragraphing, and the use of cohesive devices is very limited and repetitive (e.g., 'and then', 'so then'). The progression of ideas is difficult to follow because the text lacks punctuation to separate distinct steps in the process. To improve, you should break the information into logical paragraphs—such as an introduction, a description of the windward side, and a description of the leeward side—and use a wider variety of linking words.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive. Phrases like 'go down and down' and 'the total process... gets end' are informal and lack the precision required for an academic report. There is little attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary related to meteorology or geography, such as 'precipitation', 'moisture-laden', 'orographic lift', or 'arid'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the limited range of vocabulary prevents the response from reaching a higher band score. You should focus on using more precise, academic terminology to describe the process.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammar is significantly hindered by the lack of punctuation. The entire response consists of one long, run-on sentence, which makes it grammatically incorrect. There are frequent errors in sentence structure, such as 'the winds pushed up today's the top' (likely a typo for 'towards') and 'which resulte as rain fall'. The lack of complex sentence structures and the persistent errors in basic syntax and punctuation mean that the control of grammar is weak. You need to focus on using full stops to separate ideas and ensuring subject-verb agreement.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.