Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The illustration give information about the formation of rain shadow deserts. Finally, in sea level to island season change information about tempreture and give us detail of seasons

It is evident from diagram show formation of rain in deserts region. Firstly, in sea level winds increase and then winds pushed upwards to one side of mountains and winds change moist air rises and cools.

Furthermore, in fifth step rain is produced and fail all over the mountains and increase cooling environment and then sixth step process Windward side to Leeward side to environment dry continues over mountain. In seventh step, winds reach inland areas and dry season reach on this way.

Finally, winds reach thousand kilometer and change into cooling environment to dry season and create a dry environmenmt.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to address the task effectively. It does not provide a clear summary of the main features shown in the diagram. The description of the process is fragmented, confusing, and contains irrelevant information about 'islands' and 'seasons' which are not present in the diagram. Furthermore, the response is significantly under the 150-word minimum requirement, which severely limits the development of the topic. The explanation of the rain-shadow effect is disjointed and fails to clearly distinguish between the windward and leeward sides of the mountain, leading to a failure to report the main features accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The essay lacks a logical flow. While there is an attempt to use sequencing words like 'Firstly', 'Furthermore', and 'Finally', these are used incorrectly or in a way that does not reflect the actual progression of the process. The paragraphing is ineffective, as the ideas are not grouped logically. The relationship between sentences is often unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the scientific process being described. The text feels like a series of disconnected statements rather than a cohesive report.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very limited and often inaccurate. There are frequent errors in word choice, such as 'fail all over the mountains' (likely meant 'fall') and 'cooling environment to dry season'. The student relies on repetitive and basic language, struggling to describe the meteorological process accurately. There is no evidence of less common lexical items or an attempt to use precise scientific terminology appropriate for a diagram description. The errors in word choice sometimes impede the reader's understanding of the intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The grammatical control is weak. There are frequent errors in sentence structure, such as 'The illustration give information' (subject-verb agreement) and 'winds reach thousand kilometer' (missing articles and pluralization). The response consists mostly of simple, poorly constructed sentences. There is a lack of complex structures, and the errors in basic grammar, punctuation, and word order are frequent enough to cause significant difficulty for the reader. The text lacks the control necessary to convey information clearly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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