Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given diagram illustrate variuos step regarding rain shadow desert .Initially the winds coming from the oceanic direction move toward the mountain . As the wind alters the direction and move towrds the hill close to the windward side . Due to low temperature moist air rises and convert the air in the form of cloud . The remaining air which collide the hill of the mountain and environmental reaction occur between the air and the pollution it causes the rainfalls on the top of the mountain . later the dry air continues its journey over the mountain and it covers the remaining distance and reach to the inland areas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The student attempts to summarise the diagram regarding the formation of rain-shadow deserts, mentioning key stages such as winds moving from the ocean towards the mountain, moist air rising, and dry air reaching inland areas. However, there are significant omissions and inaccuracies in reporting the complete sequence, such as introducing extraneous and incorrect details like 'pollution'. Furthermore, the response has a major negative impact due to length: the text contains only 110 words, severely failing the 150-word minimum requirement. Consequently, the task has only been addressed partially, leading to a lower band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response presents some basic organisation with transitional words like 'Initially' and 'later', but the information is compressed into a single block paragraph instead of being logically divided. Cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or inaccurate, and referencing is not always clear, as seen in phrases like 'convert the air in the form of cloud' and 'the remaining air which collide the hill'. Overall, there is no clear overall progression or paragraphing, placing the response in the lower-middle band for this criterion.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, with noticeable errors that occasionally impede the reader. Examples include spelling and word-form errors such as 'variuos' instead of 'various', 'step' instead of 'steps', 'towrds', and incorrect collocations like 'convert the air in the form of cloud' and 'environmental reaction occur'. While some topic-related vocabulary is attempted, such as 'moist air', 'dry air', and 'inland areas', the lexical range remains minimal and inadequate for higher band scores.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but grammatical accuracy is weak throughout the text. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement and tense consistency, such as 'The given diagram illustrate' instead of 'illustrates', and missing articles or prepositions like 'reach to the inland areas'. Additionally, punctuation is neglected, and clauses are often clumsily joined. These persistent errors cause some difficulty for the reader.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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