Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The image provide process diagram and gives information about the formation of rain-shadow deserts.

In an overview, there are several steps in linear diagrams. The first step is winds approach coast and last step is dry winds reach inland areas.

To begin with, the first step is wind approach coast is tranfer in the second step winds pushed upwards, Moreover the third step is moist air rises and cools, However moist air rises and cools is tranfer into the four step is clouds form, Furthermore the fifth step is continue and into the sixth step is dry air continues over mountain.

In addition, the dry air continues over mountain is tranfer into the seven step is dry winds reach inland areas. As well as the mounatain are two sides. First side is windward side and second side is leeward side. The windward side is process is upper side and down process is leeward side.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The student makes a strong attempt to describe the process diagram detailing the formation of rain-shadow deserts. An overview is present, identifying that the diagram consists of several linear steps starting from winds approaching the coast and ending with dry winds reaching inland areas. Key geographical features such as the windward and leeward sides of the mountain are also mentioned. However, the response struggles with mechanical listing of the steps ('the first step is wind approach coast is tranfer in the second step') rather than providing a fluent, well-integrated summary of the visual data. Some information is slightly repetitive or under-developed. Nevertheless, all major stages of the process are touched upon, satisfying the core requirements of Task 1.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The response shows some logical organisation by attempting to sequence the steps chronologically and dividing the writing into short paragraphs. However, cohesion is heavily mechanical and repetitive, relying excessively on transition phrases like 'To begin with, the first step is...', 'Moreover the third step is...', and 'In addition... is tranfer into the seven step'. Referencing and logical progression are frequently disrupted by grammatical breakdowns within sentences, making the transitions feel unnatural and awkward. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs lacks smooth flow and cohesive variety.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is very basic, repetitive, and heavily restricted to direct copying of the prompts and labels provided in the diagram (e.g., 'winds approach coast', 'moist air rises and cools', 'dry winds reach inland areas'). There are frequent lexical errors and inappropriate word formations, such as 'tranfer' instead of 'transferred', and 'mounatain' instead of 'mountain'. The range of vocabulary is inadequate for achieving a higher band, as there is little evidence of less common lexical items or paraphrasing ability, causing some strain for the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. The text contains frequent, severe errors in sentence structure, verb forms, and word class. For instance, clauses are strung together without proper subordination or coordination (e.g., 'the first step is wind approach coast is tranfer in the second step winds pushed upwards'). There is a lack of control over complex structures, and simple sentences often contain foundational errors. Punctuation is also erratic, with missing full stops and misused commas. These errors frequently impede communication and require the reader to work hard to understand the intended meaning.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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