Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given process chart illustrates how one type of desert often termed as rain shadow desert.

Overall, It is a reversible process and consists of seven steps as well as all steps are essential if one of the step is elliminated, the whole process will be excluded.

During the first step, winds approaches the coast after that winds are pushed upwards, then, moist air rises and cools subsequently, clouds are formed afterwards, rain falls, after that, dry air continues over mountain last but not the least, dry winds reach inland areas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 150 words, containing only 91 words. Consequently, the description of the process is severely truncated and lacks adequate detail. While the student correctly identifies the diagram as a process chart illustrating the formation of a rain-shadow desert, the overview provided contains inaccuracies, such as claiming the process is reversible. The steps are listed in a mechanical, sequential manner without sufficient expansion, comparison, or full explanation of the geographical features depicted in the diagram, such as the windward and leeward sides.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The text is structured as two very brief paragraphs, including a single-sentence introduction and a run-on main body paragraph. Cohesion relies heavily on a repetitive chain of sequential linkers like 'after that', 'then', and 'subsequently', resulting in a comma-splice-heavy structure ('...clouds are formed afterwards, rain falls, after that, dry air...'). While there is a basic logical sequence mirroring the diagram, the lack of effective paragraphing and mechanical transitions limits overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The lexical range is limited and repetitive. The student uses basic vocabulary directly lifted from the prompt, such as 'winds approach the coast', 'moist air rises', and 'rain falls'. There are spelling errors ('elliminated') and awkward phrasing ('one of the step'). While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to describe the basic stages, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher band scores, showing little evidence of less common lexical items.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The grammatical range is extremely narrow, consisting mostly of simple and run-on compound structures linked incorrectly with commas. There are notable subject-verb agreement and pluralisation errors, such as 'one of the step is elliminated' and 'winds approaches the coast'. Punctuation is poorly handled, resulting in massive run-on sentences in the body paragraph. The majority of complex structures attempted are faulty, leading to frequent errors that disrupt the flow.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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