Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This diagram illustrates how one type of rain-shadow desert will be formed.

Overall, the diagram shows that how sea, air and temperature contributed in our environment to form the rain-shadow desert.This diagram shows the seventh step process and that shows that this process is of the thousdands of kilometres.

In this diagram, mountains is shown between the sea and desert. The wind contribution is seen mainly in the diagram that it firstly approaches to the sea and then sea coastle pushes that wind and winds gets collapse with the mountain and then when the wind goes at higher altitude the moist air rises and get cools that led it to form the clouds and the it led them to rain falls at the 6th step the air comes after the rain comes down and becomes dry this point is known as leeward side. In seventh step dry wind reached the inland areas and the whole full processs led that to the formation of rain-shadow desert.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The student attempts to address the prompt by describing the steps involved in the formation of a rain-shadow desert. An overview is provided, noting the seven-step process and the scale of thousands of kilometres. However, the response suffers from several descriptive inaccuracies and confusion regarding the sequence. For instance, the student states that the 'sea coastle pushes that wind' and that winds 'gets collapse with the mountain,' which misrepresents the diagram's geographical layout and airflow dynamics. Furthermore, the description of the later stages conflates the steps, incorrectly jumping around the numbered sequence. While the main features are touched upon, the lack of precision and inaccurate reporting of the visual data place this at Band 5.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response is divided into an introduction and two body paragraphs, representing a basic structural attempt. However, the progression of ideas is frequently impeded by run-on sentences and a lack of clear cohesive devices. The second body paragraph consists of a single, highly convoluted sentence spanning several lines ('...and then when the wind goes at higher altitude the moist air rises and get cools that led it to form the clouds and the it led them to rain falls at the 6th step...'), which makes the logical flow very difficult to follow. Reference words are used clumsily ('that', 'it'), creating ambiguity and resulting in mechanical and inadequate cohesion overall.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, heavily reliant on simple terms directly copied from the prompt and diagram (e.g., 'diagram,' 'wind,' 'mountain,' 'desert'). There are several noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'thousdands' (spelling error), 'coastle' (incorrect form of coastal), and 'gets collapse' (inappropriate collocation and grammar). Less common lexical items are attempted but used inaccurately. While communication is occasionally achieved, the limited range and frequent errors restrict the lexical score to a Band 5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The student demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying primarily on simple sentences strung together with coordinating conjunctions or relative clauses, often resulting in ungrammatical run-on sentences. There are frequent errors in verb forms, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions (e.g., 'how sea, air and temperature contributed,' 'winds is shown,' 'wind reached'). Punctuation is also weak, with missing commas and periods leading to fragmented thoughts. These pervasive errors cause significant difficulty for the reader and reflect Band 4 control.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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