Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The formation of rain-shadow deserts
Student answer (Band 4.5)
When the winds traveling with sea waves they arrived at the coastal part of mountain eventually leading the winds upward as the mountains, in the Windward side of mountain , as the most of the air rises with cooler temperature and they made clouds leading to formation of rains. on the other side of mountain is leeward side, here the most of dried air continues with mountain that mostly are going downward reaching to inland areas that makes rain shadow desert that are thousands kilometers away from coast.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, as it contains only 88 words. Consequently, the description of the process is severely under-developed and lacks the necessary detail required for an Academic Task 1 response. While the student correctly identifies the main stages of rain-shadow desert formation—such as moist air rising over the windward side, cooling to form clouds and rain, and dry air descending on the leeward side to create a desert—the overall coverage is too brief and superficial to achieve a higher score.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response is written as a single, overly long, and convoluted sentence, which severely disrupts the logical progression and readability of the text. There is a lack of appropriate paragraphing and cohesive devices to structure the stages of the diagram clearly. Referencing is also confusing at times, such as the phrase 'as the most of the air rises', making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of information smoothly.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, with limited range appropriate for an academic report. The student uses some relevant topic-specific terms such as 'coastal', 'windward side', 'leeward side', and 'rain shadow desert', which demonstrates a basic understanding of the visual data. However, frequent word choice and collocation errors, such as 'winds traveling with sea waves they arrived' and 'dried air', restrict the lexical score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The grammatical structure is extremely weak, consisting essentially of one long, run-on sentence joined by excessive conjunctions and relative clauses (e.g., 'When the winds... as the mountains... as the most of the air rises...'). There is a complete lack of control over complex sentence structures, resulting in frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that obscure the meaning. Punctuation is also incorrectly handled, with misplaced commas and a lack of proper sentence boundaries.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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