Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The diagram below illustrates one type of desert known as a rain-shadow desert is formed. overview the formation of rain shadow deserts when the wind approach coast drinks the sea so is grew up by winds pushed upwards. The mountain side up the grow the moist air rises and cools are becoming the clouds form. Than rain falls the mountain side leeward to one process the dry air continues over. Than the process started the dry winds inland areas.The rain falls the of deserts.Sea and the inland between distance of thousands of kilometres.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.5
Coherence and Cohesion4.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.0
Overall4.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 150 words, containing only 93 words, which significantly restricts the scope of the answer. While the writer attempts to describe the process of rain-shadow desert formation shown in the diagram, the response is minimal and tangential in places. Key stages such as moist air rising, clouds forming, and dry winds reaching inland areas are mentioned, but the ideas are severely under-developed and lack a clear, cohesive summary of the overall process. To reach higher bands, the writer must expand the response to meet the word count, fully describe all steps of the diagram in a logical sequence, and present a clear overview of the main features.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

Information and ideas are not arranged coherently throughout the text. The response lacks clear paragraphing, and the sequencing of the steps is disrupted by confusing transitions such as 'overview the formation' and repetitive use of 'Than' instead of 'Then'. There is a lack of logical progression, making it difficult for the reader to follow the sequential flow of the natural process from the sea to inland areas. Referencing is unclear, and cohesive devices are either absent or misused. To improve, the writer needs to group related information into clear paragraphs and use appropriate transition words to link the stages of the diagram logically.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, employing terms directly lifted from the prompt such as 'desert', 'wind', 'coast', and 'mountains'. There are noticeable errors in word choice and word formation, such as 'drinks the sea' instead of drawing moisture, and 'is grew up' instead of being forced up. These lexical limitations and errors frequently strain the reader's understanding. To achieve a higher band, the writer should build a wider range of vocabulary related to geographical processes and ensure precise word choice and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most sentences are poorly constructed, featuring frequent errors in basic sentence patterns, verb forms, and prepositions, such as 'one type of desert known as a rain-shadow desert is formed' and 'the inland between distance of thousands of kilometres'. Simple sentences are heavily flawed, and attempts at more complex structures are inaccurate, resulting in meanings that are frequently distorted. To improve, the writer must focus on foundational grammar, accurate verb tense usage, and correct sentence boundaries.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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