Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The diagram illustrates the one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert is formed.

Overall, They are the seven stages of the formation of rain-shadow deserts. the name of stages mantuoned in diagram. Winds approach coast, Winds pushed upwards, Moist air rises and cools, Clouds form, Raim falls, Dry air continues over mountain, Dry winds reach inland areas.

In the left side of the deserts is sea and right side is inland. Mountain contain a thousands of kilometers. The formation of rain shadow start in winds approach coast after that the winds pushed upward by the sea. the balanc of the air is low and they are cool. the next stage they are created by clouds form.

In contrast, the fifth level rain falls started and they are moved to dry air continues over mountain. the name of side is leeward. At last they are reached the last stage of mountain is dry winds inland areas. this is process of rain-shadow desert.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response attempts to describe the formation of a rain-shadow desert, but it addresses the task only partially. While the student identifies the overall topic and lists several stages from the diagram, the information is presented in a fragmented manner without a clear, cohesive overview. Key features such as the transition from the windward to the leeward side and the rain-shadow effect itself are poorly explained. For instance, writing that 'Mountain contain a thousands of kilometers' misinterprets the scale indicator in the visual data. The ideas remain limited and under-developed, lacking a well-structured summary of the main steps in sequence. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to select and report the main features more accurately, providing a clearer overview and fully developing all parts of the process diagram without misinterpreting labels.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response shows some basic organization, such as attempting an introductory overview and grouping details into paragraphs, but there is no clear overall progression. The movement of ideas between sentences feels disjointed and confusing. Cohesive devices are used rather mechanically or inappropriately, as seen in abrupt transitions like 'In contrast, the fifth level rain falls started' and 'At last they are reached the last stage'. Paragraphing is also poorly managed, with ideas lumped together rather than logically separated by stages of the process. Pronoun referencing and linking words are frequently inaccurate or repetitive, making the text difficult to follow smoothly. To improve coherence and cohesion, the student should use logical connectors more naturally, ensure clear referencing throughout, and structure the response into a clear introduction, body paragraphs following the chronological process, and a concise summary.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and barely adequate for the task. The student relies heavily on lifting exact terms directly from the prompt, such as 'Winds approach coast', 'Moist air rises and cools', and 'Dry air continues over mountain', rather than paraphrasing them. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'mantuoned in diagram', 'balanc of the air', and referring to the scale as 'Mountain contain a thousands of kilometers'. These errors and limited word choices cause some difficulty for the reader and restrict the response to a lower band. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary by paraphrasing source terms, using precise scientific or descriptive terms accurately, and avoiding repetitive language and basic spelling mistakes.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical range is quite limited, relying mostly on simple and faulty complex sentence forms. The response contains frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that often impede communication and cause difficulty for the reader. Examples of errors include subject-verb agreement and structural issues like 'The diagram illustrates the one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert is formed', missing prepositions ('In the left side'), and incorrect verb forms ('the fifth level rain falls started and they are moved'). Punctuation is also weak, with run-on sentences and missing capitalization. To move up to the next band, the student must increase the variety of sentence structures, ensure better control over basic grammatical patterns, and significantly reduce the frequency of errors in verb tenses, articles, and clause structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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