Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given processe chart explain the formation of rain shadow deserts.

all the process given in 7 step in the picture or can seen a big mountains,see or inland because we undertand more easyer what is the process of the rain shodow deserts.

first of all winds approch coast by see than winds puched upwards of mountains and moist air rise and became cool latter air changed in clouds form on windward side.after that clouds fly over the mountains and create rain etmospiears.when rain falls create a dry air continuesly whenever falls the rain or dry air wavying over mountain.moreover dry air through thousands of kilometres all over the inland.whenever dry winds reach in inland areas its look like rain shadow desert.it is process of how to create cloud and falls rain in inland to help see water.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the subject and include several central stages, such as winds approaching the coast, rising over mountains, cooling, cloud formation, rainfall, and dry air moving inland. However, the account is only a partial and sometimes inaccurate summary: for example, “clouds fly over the mountains and create rain” misplaces the clouds and rainfall, which occur above the windward side, while the dry air continues over the mountain to the leeward side. The final claim about rain falling inland to “help see water” is not supported by the diagram. There is also no clear overview of the overall cause-and-effect process. The response is 138 words, below the required 150. To improve, give a concise overview and describe the stages and locations accurately, without adding unsupported outcomes.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response follows a broadly chronological order, moving from winds approaching the coast to dry winds reaching inland areas. Connectors such as “first of all,” “after that,” and “moreover” show an attempt to guide the reader through the process. However, the ideas are presented as one continuous paragraph, and several links between stages are unclear or contradictory. For instance, “when rain falls create a dry air continuesly whenever falls the rain” makes the relationship between rainfall and dry air difficult to follow. The opening also includes a confusing aside about the mountains, sea, and inland. Separate the overview from the process details, and use clear sentence boundaries so each stage leads logically to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “winds,” “moist air,” “clouds,” “rain,” “mountains,” and “inland,” which helps identify the diagram’s subject. However, the range is basic and several inaccurate or misspelled expressions strain understanding, such as “rain shodow,” “puched upwards,” “rain etmospiears,” and “dry air wavying.” Some word combinations are also unnatural, including “clouds fly over” and “help see water.” Aim for precise terms that describe the process, such as “is forced upwards,” “condenses,” “precipitation,” and “leeward side.” Check spelling and use collocations that accurately express the diagram rather than relying on repeated general words such as “process” and “create.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to connect stages in longer sentences, but grammatical control is very limited, and frequent errors sometimes obscure the meaning. Examples include “The given processe chart explain,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “moist air rise and became cool,” where the verb forms are inconsistent. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also unreliable: the opening begins with a lowercase letter, and several clauses run together without clear stops. Articles and prepositions are often missing or incorrectly used, as in “by see” and “reach in inland areas.” Build accuracy first with clear simple sentences, then add subordinate clauses using correct verb forms—for example, “As the moist air rises, it cools and forms clouds.”

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