Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATE THE PROCESS OF RAIN FORMATION AND THEIR DIFFERANT STAGES.

THE PROCESS OF RAIN FORMATION IN DIAGRAM IN SEVERAL STAGES LIKE STAGE 1 TO 7 AND FROM SEA TO RAIN SHADOW DESERT.

FIRSTLY THE WIND APPROCHE THE SEA AND TOOK THE SOME VAPOUR TOWARDS THE MOUNTAIN.

ANOTHER POINT THE DIAGRAM IS ILLUSTRATE THAT THEN THSES VAPOURS BECOME CLOUD .

MOREOVER THE RAIN FALL IS ALSO SHOWING IN THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN .

MOREOVER THE ANOTHER POINT WHICH IS ALSO ILLUSTRATED IS THAT THE AFTER RAIN FALLS IN MOUNTAIN THE DRY AIR CONTINUES TOWARD LEOWARD SIDE .

FURTHER MORE IN THE FINAL STAGE THE DIAGRAM SHOWS THAT THEY REACH IN INLAND AREAS .AFTER REACHING THAT PLACE THEY CONTINUES GROWING TOWARD RAIN SHADOW DEREST AND THIS PROCESS CONTINUSOULY CIRCULATE.

MOREOVER THE THE WIND AND RAIN FORMATION ALSO TAKE THE LOT OF TIME AND ALSO TRAVEL THOUSANDS OF KILOMATERS AS SHOWN IN DIAGRAM.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the broad sequence from coastal winds to an inland rain-shadow desert, and you mention clouds, rainfall, dry air crossing the mountains, and the diagram’s distance scale. However, the account only partially explains the process and includes important inaccuracies: the winds approach from the sea, not “approche the sea,” and the diagram shows moist air being forced upwards, cooling, and forming clouds before rain falls on the windward side. The overview is also unclear, and the claim that the process “continues growing” and “circulate[s]” is not supported by the diagram. To make the report more complete, describe the cause-and-effect sequence accurately and distinguish the wet windward side from the dry leeward side.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response follows a rough chronological order, using markers such as “Firstly,” “Moreover,” and “in the final stage,” so the reader can recognise that you are describing a process. However, the progression is weakened by repeated and sometimes awkward transitions, especially the repeated use of “Moreover,” and by unclear references such as “they reach in inland areas.” The ideas are presented as one continuous block rather than in a clear overview followed by a sequenced account. Group the stages into a short introduction/overview and a logically ordered description, and use precise links such as “as a result,” “after crossing the mountain,” and “finally” only where they clarify the relationship between stages.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use several relevant terms from the diagram, including “dry air,” “mountain,” “inland areas,” and “rain shadow desert,” which gives the response a basic process-related vocabulary. However, the range is limited and many expressions are inaccurate or repetitive: “rain formation” does not describe the whole process, “took the some vapour” is unclear, and “growing toward” does not convey the movement of dry winds. Spelling errors such as “differant,” “leoward,” “dere[s]t,” and “kilomaters” also make the description less clear. Build a more precise set of process verbs and geographical terms, and check spelling and collocations before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to connect stages in longer sentences, for example with “after” and “toward,” but sentence structures are limited and frequent errors make several statements difficult to follow. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “The diagram illustrate” and “they continues”; articles and plurals are also problematic in “the some vapour” and “become cloud.” The sentence beginning “After reaching that place” has an unclear subject, while punctuation and spacing are inconsistent, including the run-on transition after “areas.” Use mostly clear simple sentences first, checking subject–verb agreement, articles, and singular/plural forms. Then add a few accurate clauses to show how rising, cooling, rainfall, and drying are connected.

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