Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The diagram illustrates the formation of the rain shadow desert with the help of sea water and moisture air.

Overall, the formation of rain shadow desert includes seven steps. However, it showed how air moisture is converted into clouds through sea water and wind across the mountain. Therefore, the mountain is spread into thousands of kilometres. Where, on the other side of the mountain rain shadow desert can be seen.

In the initial stage, the sea water approach towards mountain through wind , where wind pushed the water vapour upward and at that point the water vapour become very cool and the air becomes moist. Thus, this air is slowly converted into clouds and the rain falls started.

Furthermore, became of rain falls, dry air is reached continually on the other side of the mountain where rain shadow desert is. In the last stage , dry wind reached at the ground area of the desert.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the process as having seven stages and describe its broad movement from the sea, over the mountains, and towards an inland desert. The account also includes the key outcomes of cloud formation and rainfall on the windward side, followed by dry air reaching the leeward side. However, some stages are inaccurately explained: the diagram shows winds carrying moist air from the sea, not sea water or water vapour being pushed up the mountain. The overview’s claim that the mountain extends thousands of kilometres also misreads the scale arrow, which indicates horizontal distance. The final stages are mentioned but not clearly distinguished. A more precise overview and accurate explanation of how the air changes would make the main features clearer and more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing the earlier and later stages. Sequencing expressions such as “In the initial stage,” “Furthermore,” and “In the last stage” help the reader follow the process. However, some links are mechanical or unclear, particularly “However” and “Therefore” in the overview, where the ideas do not form a clear contrast or consequence. The sentence beginning “Where, on the other side…” is also an incomplete and confusing continuation. The final paragraph combines rainfall, dry air, and the desert without clearly showing the sequence between them. Use direct stage-to-stage links and ensure each sentence has a clear relationship to the one before it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “moist,” “clouds,” “rain falls,” “dry air,” and “desert,” so the reader can identify the general subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the description imprecise. “Sea water approach towards mountain” does not accurately express that winds carry moist air inland, while “the air is slowly converted into clouds” describes the process unnaturally. “Became of rain falls” is also difficult to understand, and “ground area” is vague. Aim for precise process terms and natural combinations, such as “moist air rises,” “condenses,” and “precipitation falls.” This will help you report the diagram accurately without relying on repeated basic words.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “where” and “while,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in verb forms and agreement appear in phrases such as “the sea water approach” and “the rain falls started.” Sentence boundaries are also problematic: “Where, on the other side of the mountain rain shadow desert can be seen” is a fragment, and the opening overview contains an unclear sentence beginning “However, it showed.” Punctuation and spacing around commas are inconsistent as well. These errors sometimes make the sequence difficult to follow. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and tense—for example, “Winds approach the coast” and “Rain begins to fall.”

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