Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given diagram show information about how one type of desert, know as a rain-shadow desert, is formed. The formation of rain-shadow deserts shows defferent categories. To begin with, first categories is winds approach coats in up of sea. Second categoary winds pushed upwards in up of first categary. Third categories Moist air rises and cools between on mountain. Fourth categoary is clouds form inside of windward side. Five categoray rain fails is up of mountain and other side six categoary is dry air continues over mountain is side of leeward side mountain. seven categoary is dry wind reach inland areas in up of inland. Inland is many kind of rain shadow desert in down in earth. This mountain lenght is thousands of kilometres. This mountain is start Sea and finshed of Inland.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the general subject and mention several stages, including air rising, cloud formation, rainfall and dry air moving inland. However, the account is mostly a list of numbered labels rather than a clear summary of how the process works, and there is no overview of the key contrast between the wet windward side and the dry leeward side. Some details are unclear or inaccurate: “Inland is many kind of rain shadow desert” is not supported by the diagram, and the mountain is not described as thousands of kilometres long; that label indicates the horizontal scale. The response also falls 17 words short of the required minimum. To address the task more fully, explain the causal sequence and accurately summarise the outcome inland.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The numbered sequence gives the reader a basic sense of order, and words such as “To begin with” and “Second” signal progression. However, the response reads as a series of disconnected stage descriptions, with repeated use of “category” and little linking of cause and effect. Phrases such as “in up of first categary” and “other side six categoary” make the relationships between stages difficult to follow. There is also no clear paragraph structure or concluding overview. Group the stages into a few connected sentences—for example, explain how moist air rises and produces rain before describing the dry air crossing the mountain—and use accurate sequencing and reference words to make the progression clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some relevant process vocabulary, including “moist air,” “windward side,” “leeward side,” “rain-shadow desert” and “inland areas.” This shows a basic range suited to the topic. However, vocabulary is repetitive, especially the repeated use of “category,” and several spelling errors—such as “defferent,” “categoary” and “coats”—make the writing harder to understand. Some word combinations are also unclear, including “in up of sea” and “many kind of rain shadow desert.” Use precise process verbs and natural collocations, such as “winds approach the coast,” “air is forced upwards” and “rain falls on the windward side.” Check spelling carefully and avoid using labels like “category” when describing stages.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

Most of the response consists of short, simple statements, with little variety in sentence structure. Frequent errors in agreement, articles and sentence construction sometimes obscure the meaning. For example, “The given diagram show” needs a singular verb, while “first categories is” has problems with both number and article use. The sequence “Third categories Moist air rises and cools between on mountain” lacks a clear grammatical structure, and “This mountain is start Sea and finshed of Inland” is difficult to interpret. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use simple linking clauses to show cause and sequence. More accurate basic sentence patterns should come before attempting longer structures.

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