Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Introduction:

The figure illustrates the formation of a rain-shadow desert which is one type of desert .

Overall, it is a natural process diagram which includes seven stages for the formation of rain-shadow desert,one type of desert. The process take place above mountains with two sides Windward side and Leeward side. The steps begin with the winds approached to coast, and ends with the dry winds reached to inland areas.

Paragraph:

Initially the winds approaching to the coast, subsequently the winds pushed upwards. After that the moist air rises and cools.Then the formation of clouds take place.

Next step is the rain begin to fall.After that the dry air proceed over mountains. At last the dry winds reach to the inland areas.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the diagram as a seven-stage natural process and give its broad direction, from winds approaching the coast to dry winds reaching inland. You also mention the mountain’s windward and leeward sides. However, the account is only partial: it does not explain that the sea supplies moist air or make clear that rain falls on the windward side, leaving dry air to cross the mountains and create a rain-shadow desert inland. The final desert is not explicitly described as the outcome. The response also contains 122 words, below the required 150, so there is limited space to select and explain the key features. Add these details and develop the overview and stages more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and a paragraph describing the stages. The sequence is generally easy to follow, and transitions such as “Initially,” “After that,” and “At last” help show order. However, the progression is somewhat mechanical because most stages are linked with similar time markers, and the short final paragraph reads as a list rather than a connected explanation. The overview also repeats the idea that this is a rain-shadow desert process, while the relationship between rainfall, dry air and the desert is not clearly connected. Grouping related stages into fuller sentences and using cause-and-effect links would make the organisation more coherent.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant process vocabulary, including “moist air,” “clouds,” “rain,” “dry air,” and the labels “Windward side” and “Leeward side.” These choices make the general subject understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are awkward or repetitive, such as “the winds approaching to the coast,” “the formation of clouds take place,” and “the dry air proceed over mountains.” The repeated use of “winds” and “step” also restricts precision. Use more natural process collocations, for example, “moist air rises,” “precipitation falls on the windward slope,” and “air descends on the leeward side.” This would describe the diagram more precisely and improve fluency.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple sentences and longer sequences, and the reader can usually understand the order of events. However, the range is limited, and errors in verb forms and sentence construction occur frequently. For example, “The process take place” needs subject–verb agreement, while “the winds approached to coast” and “the dry winds reached to inland areas” use past forms where the process description calls for present simple. The opening sequence, “Initially the winds approaching to the coast,” is also an incomplete clause, and punctuation is inconsistent, including missing spaces after full stops. Practise accurate present-simple process sentences and combine stages with clauses such as “As the air rises, it cools and clouds form.”

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