Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The rain-shadow dsert formation show that , firstly when the wind flow over the sea and gone to the top of the sea, this wind pushed the vapours of the water towards the sea over. The air who pushed the the water vapours moises the air and cools it.After that this air convert the air vapours towards the cloud form. this formatioin of clouds due to the drops or vapours of the sea. Due to the drops of water the clouds form and then rainfalls. Rainfalls are duu to drops of watewr sea, the rainfalls was vry high speed.at over the mountains the speed of water is low because it has very very closed to the clouds. The dry air over the mountains contain this water and flow thius water towards the inland areas. This wind is over the mountain, due to this dry air the water was reached at the wind land area.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify several relevant stages, including winds approaching from the sea, air rising and cooling, cloud formation, rainfall, and dry air moving inland. However, the account only minimally fulfils the task because key relationships are misreported or unclear. For example, the wind does not push water vapour “towards the sea”; moist air is forced up the windward mountain slope, where it cools and forms clouds. The explanation that rainfall is “vry high speed” and that water is carried over the mountains is not supported by the diagram. There is also no clear overview of the process or its outcome: dry winds reaching inland create a rain-shadow desert. Focus on accurately describing the sequence and the contrast between the wet windward side and dry leeward side.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response follows a rough chronological order, using signals such as “firstly” and “After that,” so the reader can recognise an attempt to describe a process. However, progression is weakened by repeated or confusing statements: cloud formation and rainfall are explained more than once, and the final sentences repeat the movement of dry air without clearly connecting it to the desert. Several references, such as “this air” and “this water,” are difficult to interpret. Organise the account into a clear beginning, middle, and outcome, and use each stage once. More precise links such as “as a result” or “on the leeward side” would help show how one stage leads to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “wind,” “vapours,” “clouds,” “rainfalls,” “mountains,” and “inland areas,” which helps establish the topic. However, the range is basic and several word choices or collocations make the process difficult to understand. Phrases such as “top of the sea,” “moises the air,” and “wind land area” do not clearly describe the diagram, while “rainfalls” is repeatedly used where “rain” or “precipitation” would be more natural. Spelling errors, including “dsert,” “formatioin,” and “watewr,” also reduce clarity. Build a small set of accurate process terms—such as “moist air,” “windward slope,” “leeward side,” and “rain-shadow desert”—and use them consistently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example, “After that this air convert the air vapours towards the cloud form,” but sentence structures are very limited and errors occur frequently. Verb forms and agreement are often inaccurate (“wind flow,” “air convert,” “rainfalls was”), and articles and prepositions are missing or misplaced. Some sentences also run together without appropriate punctuation, as in “cools it.After that,” making the relationships harder to follow. These errors sometimes distort the intended meaning, particularly when describing how air rises and produces rain. Practise writing short, accurate process sentences first, then combine them with clauses using “when,” “as,” and “therefore.” Check subject–verb agreement and past or present tense consistency.

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