Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

the rain shadow desert ia great miracal of allah almighty. when they formed they looked like bunch of cotton .they make the atmosphere pleasant.everyone look too happy.the wind are getting rise from the surface of the sea.there is tiny drops in the wind which make it more moist.the wind pushed upward from the sea surface.the moist air rose and the clouds are formed.these clouds are full of water.These clouds are getting rise thorough wind and they move from one place to another. and clouds move to the mountain.The clouds are raing at the windward side and then the clouds move to the leeward side. When the rain stops the dry air continue to move and they make the environment more pleasant because everythimg was washed by the raining clouds.The distance between the coast and rain shadow desert is about thiousand kilometers.The dry air after the raining of cloud reaches to the inland areas and the rain shadow desert is formed. .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several relevant stages, including winds approaching from the sea, air rising, clouds forming, rain falling on the windward side, and dry air reaching inland. However, the response only minimally describes the process as a diagram summary: it opens with unrelated claims about Allah, happiness, and the atmosphere being pleasant, and it does not give a clear overview of the process as a whole. Some details are inaccurate or unsupported, such as saying the clouds move to the leeward side and that rain makes the environment pleasant. The key cause-and-effect sequence—moist air cools, precipitation occurs on the windward side, and dry air descends or continues inland to create a rain-shadow desert—needs to be reported more precisely and objectively.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic chronological thread: the response moves from winds over the sea to rising air, clouds, rain, and inland dry air. This gives the reader some sense of the process. However, the ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and unrelated comments interrupt the sequence. Connections such as “and then” and repeated references to “these clouds” do not always make the relationships between stages clear; for example, the claim that clouds move to the leeward side conflicts with the later description of dry air continuing inland. Organise the response into an introduction and a concise process description, using clear sequencing and cause-and-effect links to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant process vocabulary, including “moist air,” “windward side,” “leeward side,” “inland areas,” and “rain shadow desert.” These terms show an attempt to describe the diagram rather than relying entirely on general language. However, much of the vocabulary is basic or repetitive, and several choices are inaccurate or unsuitable for an academic report, such as “miracal,” “bunch of cotton,” and “environment more pleasant.” Spelling errors, including “thiousand” and “everythimg,” also reduce clarity. Use precise, neutral terms for the stages and avoid imaginative or evaluative descriptions that are not shown in the diagram.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to connect stages in longer sentences, for example, “The moist air rose and the clouds are formed,” but control of sentence structure and verb forms is inconsistent. Tenses shift between present and past (“are getting rise,” “rose,” “was washed”), and subject–verb agreement is often incorrect, as in “The wind are getting rise” and “there is tiny drops.” Articles and plurals are also frequently missing or inaccurate. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are weak, with several ideas joined by full stops or “and” without clear control. Practise writing short, accurate present-simple sentences first, then combine stages using clauses such as “As the air rises, it cools and forms clouds.”

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