Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.5)

So they are mainy show the how Sea,coast and Rain- shadow desert work.Firstly the winds apporach coast and tgen the Winds pushed upwards cause the clouds formation work then the moist air rises cause when they rises then the rise are coller cause the upward side winds are cool then the clouds form or then Rain falls the procces is called formulation. then the dry air continues over the mountain or leeward side when they are gatting sarted then then formation are getting started or restart. Then the dry winds reach the inlands area the process are restart or continuous when the rain shadow desert and the area of shadow are cross the mountain are get small cause the winds and rain falls are the natural billed. They are some main feature are Rain Shadow dersert are work together and they are very relevant or good to nature or they called formulation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several central stages, including winds approaching the coast, rising over the mountains, rain falling on the windward side, and dry winds continuing inland. This shows some understanding of the diagram. However, the account is difficult to follow and does not clearly explain the overall cause-and-effect pattern: moist air rises and cools, precipitation removes moisture, and the remaining dry air creates a rain-shadow desert on the leeward side. The claims that the process “restart[s]” and that the desert or shadow “get small” are not supported by the diagram. A clearer summary of the complete sequence and the contrast between the wet windward side and dry inland side would make the response more fully relevant.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response attempts to follow the process in sequence, using “Firstly,” “then,” and “when,” so the reader can recognise some movement from the coast towards inland areas. However, ideas are not arranged into clear stages or paragraphs, and repeated linking words do not establish reliable relationships between them. For example, “then the formation are getting started or restart” interrupts the sequence, while the final sentences repeat that the process is “continuous” without clarifying what happens. Several references, such as “they” and “the area of shadow,” have unclear meanings. Group the stages into a logical progression and use precise links to show cause and result.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “winds,” “clouds,” “rain falls,” “mountain,” and “leeward side,” which helps identify the topic. However, the range is basic and often repetitive, and inaccurate word choice or spelling makes parts difficult to understand. Phrases such as “the natural billed,” “formulation,” and “the area of shadow are cross the mountain” do not communicate the intended geographical meaning. Use the diagram’s precise terms consistently, especially “moist air,” “cools,” “precipitation,” “windward side,” and “rain-shadow desert.” Avoid repeating general words such as “work” and “process” when a specific verb can describe each stage.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response makes an effort to connect events in longer sentences, but sentence structures are very limited and frequent errors obscure the sequence. For example, “the moist air rises cause when they rises” has faulty clause construction and subject–verb agreement, while “the dry winds reach the inlands area” does not form a clear grammatical sentence. Verb forms and agreement are also inconsistent in “the formation are getting started.” Punctuation is weak: long strings of ideas are joined without clear sentence boundaries. Practise writing short, complete sentences first, then combine related stages with accurate clauses, such as “As moist air rises, it cools and clouds form.”

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