Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The diagram shows how the rain-shadow desert made by a natural phenomenal, and how the water moved more than a thousand of kilometres and a cross of the mountains.

It seems impossible if you think of that but it's just the nature doing her thing like how we see in the formation that we have sea and the mountains is the only thing between the rain-shadow desert and the see and there is a big distance between them so the water can't be moved from dirt so how this is happening, like we see that the when the winds comes he pushes upwards the mountain until he reaches a point that the air rises and cools because of the low temperature in the high distances, and the cold air form clouds and the rain falls in the top of the mountains and right after that the dry air continues over the mountains until he reaches the the inland of the desert and that's how the rain-shadow desert forms from a natural phenomenal.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the main sequence: winds approach from the sea, rise over the mountains, cool, produce clouds and rain, and then continue inland as dry air. This shows a relevant understanding of the process. However, the task is only partly addressed because the account is not presented as a clear, objective summary. The opening focuses on whether the process seems “impossible” and speculates that water cannot move “from dirt,” neither of which is shown in the diagram. Some details are also imprecise: rain falls on the windward side rather than simply “in the top” of the mountains, and the diagram indicates a distance of thousands of kilometres, not just “more than a thousand.” Focus on the key stages and their relationship to the rain-shadow desert.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response follows the broad order of the diagram, so a reader can trace the process from coastal winds to the inland desert. However, the information is compressed into two paragraphs, with nearly all the stages placed in one very long sentence. This makes the progression difficult to follow and gives the explanation no clear overview or distinct stage-by-stage development. Linking phrases such as “and right after that” are used, but the repeated “and” and the conversational question interrupt the flow rather than clarify relationships. Organise the response into a brief introduction and overview, followed by a sequence of shorter sentences. Use clear references such as “as the air rises” and “on the leeward side” to connect each stage.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “winds,” “rises,” “cools,” “clouds,” “rain,” and “dry air,” which helps convey the diagram’s subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or informal, sometimes making the meaning harder to interpret. For example, “natural phenomenal” is not the correct form or expression, “the water moved” does not accurately describe the movement of moist air, and “a cross of the mountains” is unclear. “Dirt” is also not an appropriate description of the inland area. Aim for precise terms from the diagram, such as “moist air,” “windward side,” “leeward side,” and “precipitation,” and avoid conversational wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect several stages using subordinate clauses, for example, “because of the low temperature” and “until he reaches,” but these complex constructions are often faulty or difficult to follow. There are frequent problems with agreement and verb forms: “the mountains is,” “the winds comes,” and “the cold air form clouds.” Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “the the inland,” while the long sentence beginning “and how the water moved” contains several ideas joined without effective punctuation. These errors can make the process unclear even though its general sequence is recognisable. Practise writing one stage per sentence, checking subject–verb agreement and articles, and use passive forms where appropriate, such as “the air is pushed upwards.”

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