Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The formation of rain-shadow deserts

Student answer (Band 4.0)

THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATES HOW ONE TYPE OF DESERT, KNOWN AS A RAIN-SHADOW DESERT, IS FORMED.

OVERALL, IT IS CLEAR THAT THE DIAGRAM HAS SEVEN MAIN STAGES. BEGINNING WITH MOIST AIR RISING FROM THE SEA LEVEL AND ENDING WHEN DRY WINDS REACH TO INLAND. AND THE WINDS TRAVEL THOUSANDS OF KILOMETERS ALONG WITH MOUNTAINS.

TO BEGIN WITH, THE FORMATION OF RAIN-SHADOW DESERTS STARTS FROM SEA

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The opening correctly identifies the diagram as showing the formation of a rain-shadow desert, and the overview recognises a sequence of stages ending with dry winds reaching inland. However, the response stops before explaining the process: it does not report the key stages of air being forced up the mountains, cooling, cloud formation, rainfall on the windward side, and dry air continuing over the leeward side. The claim that the process begins with “moist air rising from the sea level” also misstates the sequence; winds first approach from the sea and are then pushed upwards by the mountains. The response is substantially under the required 150 words, with 52 words submitted and 13 prompt words excluded. Develop the stages in order and include the mountain’s role and the desert’s inland location.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening statement is followed by an overview and then a process paragraph beginning “To begin with”. The sequence is also signalled by “Beginning with” and “ending”. However, the final paragraph breaks off after “starts from sea”, so there is no progression through the stages and the reader cannot follow the process as a whole. The overview’s sentence beginning “Beginning with…” is grammatically incomplete, which also weakens the connection between ideas. Use complete paragraphs and link each stage explicitly—for example, explain what happens as the air reaches the mountains, then what follows on the inland side.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses relevant topic vocabulary, including “rain-shadow desert”, “moist air”, “dry winds”, “sea level” and “inland”, so the subject is identifiable. However, the range is very limited because the description ends before naming several central features, such as clouds, rainfall, the windward side and the leeward side. Some phrasing is imprecise or unnatural: “winds travel … along with mountains” does not clearly describe the diagram, and “reach to inland” uses an unsuitable construction. Aim for precise process language and accurate collocations, such as winds being forced over a mountain and dry air moving inland. Check spelling conventions consistently, including “kilometres” in British English.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts more than simple statements, using an introductory clause such as “Beginning with … and ending …”, and the opening sentence is understandable. However, the range is narrow and the longer construction is not controlled: “Beginning with … and ending …” is a fragment rather than a complete sentence. There are also errors in sentence structure and prepositions, including “the formation … starts from sea” and “winds reach to inland”. The extra spacing before “when” and the full stop after “inland” further interrupt the flow. Build complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and practise patterns such as “winds reach inland” and “the process begins when winds approach the coast.”

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