Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
All university undergraduate courses should include a period of time spent studying abroad or doing a work placement.
Do you think the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In my opinion, all the universities that should include undergraduate courses could spent a period of time studing abroad and also doing a work placement. Because all the universities who are teaching the undergraduate courses are taking too much money from the students. The students wants to doing work with her studies. The parents of all students are not very well educated and well learned. They earn a short of money. With this money not every parents pay the universities fees. So, every university should include a period of time to doing work for every students who wants to doing work.
Another, crucial aspect to consider is how include a period of time for doing a work placement can help individuals grow and excel in different areas of life. By embracing these principles, people could acquire new skills, deepen their commitment, to personal and professional development, and achieve a more fulfiling life.
Moreover, It is heartening to see proactive efforts being made by authorties, such as the Pakistani government to educate citizens about the potential downsides of doing a work placement. Following this path could result in increasing success, efficiency and an overall better quality of life for individuals across various social ecnomic backgrounds.
In conclusion, while there are valid concerns about the effects of having advantages and disadvantages doing work placement or should include a period of time to spent studying abroad. There is also an opportunity for social improvements and individual advancement, if we approach it with wisdom and foresight.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response makes a general case for work placements, especially by linking them to students’ financial needs and personal development. However, it addresses the question only minimally: the task asks whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, but your position on this comparison is not clearly stated or maintained. Studying abroad is mentioned in the introduction and conclusion but is not discussed in the body, and the supposed disadvantages are not explained. The reference to the Pakistani government educating citizens about “the potential downsides” is also unclear and does not support a relevant argument. To strengthen the response, state directly which side outweighs the other, then develop relevant advantages and disadvantages with specific explanations or examples.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
There is an attempt to organise the response into paragraphs, and expressions such as “Moreover” and “In conclusion” signal transitions. However, the ideas are not arranged in a coherent line of argument: the opening focuses on university costs and students’ need to work, the next paragraph shifts to personal growth, and the following one introduces government efforts without explaining their connection. The conclusion refers to “valid concerns” and “advantages and disadvantages” but does not resolve the comparison. Some linking phrases are also awkward or do not clarify the relationship between ideas. Build a clearer sequence—position, developed advantages, developed disadvantages, and a comparative conclusion—and use references and transitions that make those connections explicit.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The response includes some topic-related vocabulary, such as “work placement,” “personal and professional development,” and “social economic backgrounds,” and attempts more formal expressions like “proactive efforts.” However, the range is uneven and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors make parts difficult to understand: “a short of money,” “fulfiling,” “authorties,” and “social ecnomic” are examples. Some phrases are also vague or unnatural, including “increasing success, efficiency” and “doing work with her studies.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and precise terms for the task, such as “financial pressure,” “gain practical experience,” and “study abroad.” Proofreading spelling and choosing simpler, clearer phrasing would improve control.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response attempts both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a sentence beginning “By embracing these principles” and a conditional clause with “if we approach it with wisdom and foresight.” However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes obscure the intended meaning. Examples include “all the universities that should include,” “could spent,” “The students wants,” and “every parents pay.” The opening fragment beginning “Because” is not joined correctly to the preceding idea, and the final sentence is also incomplete in structure: “while there are valid concerns about the effects of having advantages and disadvantages…” Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, verb forms, and complete sentence construction before adding complex clauses; clearer punctuation will also help readers follow your ideas.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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