Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

All university undergraduate courses should include a period of time spent studying abroad or doing a work placement.

Do you think the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

I Think that we should work and make the programs through which the student can get the opportunity to study abroad and this is very beneficial for all of us because we konw that in our country there are very less opportunity for all the young generation.most of the student by getting phd they are jobless beacuse there is no strategies applied in our to make the youth more capable.the universities offer the degree government does not make such strategies through which the youth get the job.when we move to abroad we can get the more knowledge and experience.by these kind of prgrams our generation move to abroad and they will be more experienced than other because in abroad there are many strict policies through which no one can do any illegal task.there are proper disciplinary rules which must be folloed by the public. there is no chance of being kidnapped.our country was very strong but now it is going through many financial crises and economic decelaration.so when we move to abroad then we get the nation which is more disciplined and justified.we konw that every country should face the bad time but overcome this problem we should work on it and make thge strategies through which our nation become more civilized but our government is not working on it.so if government is not working we have to work and move our nation to abroad through which the nation become more ethical.because they adapt themselves in the other country environment.so its a best move to make our country more developed.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response gives a broadly relevant view that overseas study or work experience could benefit young people and help national development. It refers to gaining “more knowledge and experience” and adapting to another country’s environment. However, it does not clearly weigh advantages against disadvantages, and the position is not consistently focused on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Much of the discussion shifts to unemployment, government policy, discipline, and national economic problems without explaining how these points relate specifically to a required period abroad or a work placement. There are no concrete examples, and the ideas are mostly asserted rather than explained. To strengthen the response, state your position directly, address at least one disadvantage, and develop a few relevant reasons with specific examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a recognisable central direction: the writer argues that experience abroad could benefit students and the country. Some linking expressions, such as “because,” “so,” and “when,” show attempts to connect reasons and results. However, the response is presented as one continuous block, with no paragraphing to separate the position, supporting points, and conclusion. Ideas also move abruptly from joblessness to strict policies, kidnapping, economic crises, and national development, so the progression is difficult to follow. Repeated use of “so” and “because” makes the connections feel mechanical, while references such as “these kind of programs” are not always clearly tied to a specific point. Organise the essay into clear paragraphs and use a more deliberate sequence of claims and explanations.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The writer attempts vocabulary relevant to education and society, including “opportunity,” “experience,” “disciplinary rules,” “financial crises,” and “economic.” These choices show an effort to discuss more than basic personal benefits. However, the range is repetitive and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the intended meaning unclear: “very less opportunity,” “strategies applied in our,” and “economic decelaration” are examples. Spelling errors such as “konw,” “beacuse,” and “folloed” also reduce accuracy. Aim to learn common academic collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms for employment, practical skills, and the costs or challenges of studying abroad would help express the task’s ideas more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example by using “because” and “when,” but most sentences rely on similar simple patterns and there is little controlled variety. Errors in sentence boundaries and punctuation make the writing difficult to read; for instance, “there is no chance of being kidnapped.our country was very strong” needs clearer separation and capitalisation. There are also problems with articles, agreement, and sentence construction, as in “the student can get the opportunity” and “the nation become more ethical.” These errors recur and sometimes obscure how ideas relate. Practise building accurate sentences with a clear subject and verb, then combine them using a range of clauses. Careful proofreading for punctuation and agreement would improve clarity.

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