Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The line graph illustrates, the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Overall, the trend is gradualy downward. the shops in country approximately same throughout the period.

In 2011, new shops decreased massivly. In addition, the closed shops in a country fell gradually.

In 2015, the number of closed shops were fell heavily. On the other hand the new shops in a country rose gradualy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify the graph’s subject and mention changes in both shop closures and openings, but the report is far too brief to summarise the main features adequately. It contains only 57 words, below the required 150; 21 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Several claims also misrepresent the data: openings did not decrease in 2011 (they fell from about 8,500 in 2011 to 3,900 in 2012), and closures did not fall gradually across the period, since they peaked in 2013 before plunging in 2015. The overview that the figures stayed “approximately same” is too vague and inaccurate. Include a clear overview and accurate comparisons across the years.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic sequence: an introduction, a general statement, and comments about particular years. Linking phrases such as “In addition” and “On the other hand” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the years and trends are not explained in a clear order, and the short report does not group the data into meaningful stages. The contrast introduced by “On the other hand” is also unclear without accurate context. Organise the response into a concise overview followed by paragraphs comparing the two series, using time references to guide the reader through the main changes.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing a graph, including “trend,” “decreased,” “fell,” and “rose,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is narrow and several choices are imprecise or incorrectly formed, such as “gradualy,” “massivly,” and “gradualy” again. “The shops in country approximately same” does not express the intended comparison clearly, while “closed shops” is less precise than “shop closures” or “the number of shops closing.” Aim for accurate trend language and vary it appropriately: for example, describe a sharp fall, a peak, or a fluctuation only where the figures support that description. Check spelling and collocations before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response uses mostly simple sentence patterns, with a few attempts to connect clauses, as in “In addition, the closed shops in a country fell gradually.” Errors in sentence construction and agreement are frequent enough to make some statements unclear. For example, “the shops in country approximately same throughout the period” lacks a verb and an article, and “the number of closed shops were fell heavily” combines an incorrect agreement form with an unsuitable verb construction. Capitalisation after the full stop is also inconsistent in “the shops.” Practise complete subject–verb sentences, such as “The number of closures fell sharply in 2015,” and use a wider range of accurate structures to compare years.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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